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In many places new homes are needed, but the only available space for building in the countryside. But some people believe that it is more important to protect countryside and not build a new home there. What is your opinion about this, give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own experience or knowledge. v.1

In many places new homes are needed, but the only available space for building in the countryside. But some people believe that it is more important to protect countryside and not build a new home there. What is your opinion about this, give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own experience or knowledge. v. 1
Building a house is a dream for most and is a necessity of many countries to build more houses, but the space available for construction is in the countryside. While some people argue about protecting the countryside and no construction should be allowed in there. I tend to agree with the former statement of construction in the countryside as it is peaceful and less crowded. The most significant advantage of living in a country area is greenery. Most of the cities are now concrete and limited space is available for gardens and playgrounds. While, outskirts are a lot more green and have plenty of gardens. For example, as per the index by the US government, cities has 5% of land covered with grass as compared to 30% in the outskirts. It is because, cost of land has increased exponentially in cities, and builders are more interested in making it more lucrative. Therefore, a house outside of town, will allow people a better air quality along with a better lifestyle. Another compelling advantage of living outside the town is time saved in travelling. Travelling is the most exhausting part of a city life, as it might take few hours to travel from one place to another. To illustrate this, on an average a person spends an hour travelling to work. In contrast, outside its perimeter its just 15 min. That is the reason, people are moving out of city life and trying to settle in an outside area. Also, it provides them with a great opportunity to spend time with family and friends. In conclusion, despite some people oppose building of a new home in the country area. In my opinion, building and living outside the city has more advantages, as it allows everyone to live in a peaceful and comfortable environment.
Building a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
is a dream for most and is a necessity of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
countries to build more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the space available for construction is in the countryside. While
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
argue about protecting the countryside and no construction should be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
allowed
in there. I tend to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the former statement of construction in the countryside as it is peaceful and less crowded.

The most significant advantage of living in a country area is greenery. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
concrete and limited space is available for gardens and playgrounds. While, outskirts are a lot more green and have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
plenty
of gardens.
For example
, as per the index by the US
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
has 5% of land covered with grass as compared to 30% in the outskirts. It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
, cost of land has increased
exponentially
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cities
, and builders are more interested in making it more lucrative.
Therefore
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
of town, will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
a better air quality along with a better lifestyle.

Another compelling advantage of living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
the town is time saved in travelling. Travelling is the most exhausting part of a city life, as it might take few hours to travel from one place to another. To illustrate this, on an average a person spends an hour travelling to work.
In contrast
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
its perimeter its
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
15 min.
That is
the reason,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are moving out of city life and trying to settle in an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
area.
Also
, it provides them with a great opportunity to spend time with family and friends.

In conclusion
, despite
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
oppose building of a new home in the country area. In my opinion, building and living
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
outside
the city has more advantages, as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allows
everyone to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a peaceful and comfortable environment.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay In many places new homes are needed, but the only available space for building in the countryside. But some people believe that it is more important to protect countryside and not build a new home there. What is your opinion about this, give reason for your answer and include any relevant example from your own experience or knowledge. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
301 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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