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In many countries women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security the marriage can bring. To what extent do you agree?

In recent years, the tendency of getting married has been following a gradual long-term decrease within women. Some people state that the main reason of this movement is that women became more stable in regard to their financial status, and they do not need support which marriage can bring. I absolutely disagree with this statement and this essay will explain why women are putting off marriage. To begin with, there is an opinion that the increasing rate of divorces has an impact on making a decision to tie the knot among feminin part of our society. To put it differently, the experience of seeing their parents going through break-ups can alter women’s understanding of a perfect life; as many girls nowadays live in a single-parent family, they do not have an appropriate example of happy couple. To illustrate this points, in Russia, the number of split-ups has been presenting a slight decline during past decades, as a result, the rate of marriage in the country has hit a record low in 2019. Moreover, recently, modern lifestyle has drastically modified women’s priorities. In other words, compared with the past where starting from their seventeenth each girls dreamt about a bridal party, family creation and a child’s born, now, they are more focusing on self-education and a brilliant career. To be specified, I can provide a personnel example, as being twenty seven years old, I am still not planning to get married. Hence there is a variety of plans and goals to be achieved at work, as well as educational tasks, I am putting off the idea to find an ideal husband and devote my time to family. In conclusion, recently the rate of marriages has represented a significant drop within women and some people suggest that it happens mostly because our majestic part of the world is more financially independent nowadays. However, I strongly believe that the main two reasons of decline in this tendency are the painful divorces of girls’ parents and changing of priorities among women.
In recent years, the tendency of getting married has been following a gradual long-term decrease within
women
.
Some
people
state that the main reason of this movement is that
women
became more stable in regard to their financial status, and they do not need support which marriage can bring. I
absolutely
disagree with this statement and this essay will
explain
why
women
are putting off marriage.

To
begin
with, there is an opinion that the increasing rate of divorces has an impact on making a decision to tie the knot among
feminin
part of our society. To put it
differently
, the experience of seeing their parents going through break-ups can alter
women’s
understanding of a perfect life; as
many
girls nowadays
live
in a single-parent family, they do not have an appropriate example of happy couple.
To
illustrate this points, in Russia, the number of split-ups has been presenting a slight decline during past decades,
as a result
, the rate of marriage in the country has hit a record low in 2019.

Moreover
, recently, modern lifestyle has
drastically
modified
women’s
priorities.
In other words
, compared with the past where starting from their seventeenth each
girls
dreamt about a bridal party, family creation and a child’s born,
now
, they are more focusing on self-education and a brilliant career. To
be specified
, I can provide a personnel example, as being
twenty seven
years
old
, I am
still
not planning to
get
married.
Hence
there is a variety of plans and goals to
be achieved
at work,
as well
as educational tasks, I am putting off the
idea
to find an ideal husband and devote my time to family.

In conclusion
, recently the rate of marriages has represented a significant drop within
women
and
some
people
suggest that it happens
mostly
because
our majestic part of the world is more
financially
independent nowadays.
However
, I
strongly
believe that the main two reasons of decline in this tendency are the painful divorces of girls’ parents and changing of priorities among
women
.
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IELTS essay In many countries women no longer feel the need to get married. Some people believe that this is because women are able to earn their own income and therefore do not require the financial security the marriage can bring.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
337 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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