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In many Countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of Crime? How can we deal with those causes? v.24

In many Countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of Crime? How can we deal with those causes? v. 24
Nowadays, increasing crime at an alarming rate in several nations due to many reasons, it is a solvable issue with proper action. I write up the causes and management in this essay. Let us begin with, there are numerous factors for the rising offences, To explain, these days violations are spreading like wildfire due to unemployment, illiteracy, and overpopulation. Firstly, unemployment is a primary cause of crime which happens in civilization, it results from people not able to fulfil fundamental needs in daily life. While people get basic needs involving various felonies like theft and robbery. Secondly, the lack of education is another reason for illegal activities. Because of this mainly youngsters are affected, in the city due to high cost and overpopulation, many students are forced to labour in a young age, there they learn various violent activities and becoming a prisoner. Thirdly, overpopulation is the other problem with nation, the government cannot afford to meet the basic requirements of society as a result of excessive growth of population it leads to irrational activities of people among the community. However, these problems can easily solve by the involvement of the authority and cooperation of the individual. The ministry has to promote a good education system like free books, low cost, and free uniforms. They need to provide awareness regarding the importance of schooling. People are literacy easy to eliminate unemployment in a country. In addition, the management of the government needs to establish a few effective schemes like lone without or low interest, self-employment, and infrastructure development project, it enhances career opportunities and reduces illegal actions of the public in the country. To conclude, there are multiple factors that create offences in many situations in society. Even though the government and personal attention can solve it easier.
Nowadays, increasing crime at an alarming rate in several nations due to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons, it is a solvable issue with proper action. I write up the causes and management in this essay.

This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Let
us
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are numerous factors for the rising
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
, To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
, these days violations are spreading like wildfire due to unemployment, illiteracy, and overpopulation.
Firstly
, unemployment is a primary cause of crime which happens in civilization, it results from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
not able to fulfil fundamental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
in daily life. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
involving various felonies like theft and robbery.
Secondly
, the lack of education is another reason for illegal activities.
Because of this
mainly
youngsters are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
, in the city due to high cost and overpopulation,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
students
are forced
to
Possible spelling mistake. 'labour' is British English.
labour
in a young age, there they learn various violent activities and becoming a prisoner.
Thirdly
, overpopulation is the other problem with nation, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
cannot afford to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
meet
the basic requirements of society
as a result
of excessive growth of population it leads to irrational activities of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
among the community.

However
, these problems can
easily
solve by the involvement of the authority and cooperation of the individual. The ministry
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
promote a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
education system like free books, low cost, and free uniforms. They
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to provide awareness regarding the importance of schooling.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are literacy easy to eliminate unemployment in a country.
In addition
, the management of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
needs
to establish a few effective schemes like lone without or low interest, self-employment, and infrastructure development project, it enhances career opportunities and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduces
illegal actions of the public in the country.

To conclude
, there are multiple factors that create
Possible spelling mistake. 'offences' is British English.
offences
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
situations in society.
Even though
the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
and personal attention can solve it easier.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes

IELTS essay In many Countries, the amount of crime is increasing. What do you think are the main causes of Crime? How can we deal with those causes? v. 24

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
298 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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