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IN MANY COUNTRIES, THE AGE OF CRIMINALS IS GETTING LOWER. GIVE REASONS AND SOLUTIONS TO THE PROBLEM.

IN MANY COUNTRIES, THE AGE OF CRIMINALS IS GETTING LOWER. GIVE REASONS AND SOLUTIONS TO THE PROBLEM. 6mmMB
Recent global statistics reveals that the younger people are getting more involved in unlawful activities. The number of detainees in juvenile centres is rising annually. Many countries have to introduce special law to deal with the cases involving underage children. Different people give different reasons for such a tragic trend. I believe that two main reasons for teenage crimes are lack of parental guidance and poverty. This essay will discuss the said reasons and suggest ways to solve the issue before coming to a conclusion. To begin with, teenagers living in poverty are more likely to do something illegal. Due to the absence of basic amenities and staggering difference in wealth gap a general sense of dissatisfaction arises, and they are forced to steal to fulfil their daily needs. Data shows that people living below the poverty line could not afford a proper meal for even a single time in a day. Government has launched a number of welfare programs for destitute people but most of the people are still unaware and I believe authorities should conduct regular survey and seminars to educate them. For example, recently Indian government has launched a drive in rural areas to educate the poor inhabitants about different programs which can help their children to study and help them to grow. Secondly, individuals who are neglected by their parents in their childhood have a tendency of violent behaviour. Today, in most of the households, both parents are working and sometimes they are not able to spend quality with their young ones. As a result, the kids end up engaging in criminal activities. The government should provide extra counsellors in schools and educational institutions where students can walk up freely for counselling. In conclusion, parents must find a balance between their work and home life. Children need their parents to teach them about right and wrong. Moreover, government has a duty toward citizens and should provide the necessary infrastructure to help teenagers to tackle their problems.
Recent global statistics reveals that the younger
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are getting more involved in unlawful activities. The number of detainees in juvenile
Possible spelling mistake. 'centres' is British English.
centres
is rising
annually
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
countries
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
introduce special law to deal with the cases involving underage children.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
reasons for such a tragic trend. I believe that two main reasons for teenage crimes are lack of parental guidance and poverty. This essay will discuss the said reasons and suggest ways to solve the issue
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
coming to a conclusion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
living in poverty are more likely to do something illegal. Due to the absence of basic amenities and staggering difference in wealth gap a general sense of dissatisfaction arises, and they
are forced
to steal to fulfil their daily needs. Data
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
living below the poverty line could not afford a proper meal for even a single time in a day.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
has launched a number of welfare programs for destitute
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
still
unaware and I believe authorities should conduct regular survey and seminars to educate them.
For example
, recently Indian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has launched a drive in rural areas to educate the poor inhabitants about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
programs which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
their children to study and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
them to grow.

Secondly
, individuals who
are neglected
by their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
in their childhood have a tendency of violent
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, in most of the households, both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
are working and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
they are not able to spend quality with their young ones.
As a result
, the kids
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
up engaging in criminal activities. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
should provide extra
Possible spelling mistake. 'counsellors' is British English.
counsellors
in schools and educational institutions where students can walk up
freely
for counselling.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
find a balance between their work and home life. Children need their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
parents
to teach them about right and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
.
Moreover
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has a duty toward citizens and should provide the necessary infrastructure to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
to tackle their problems.
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One language sets you in a corridor for life. Two languages open every door along the way.
Frank Smith

IELTS essay IN MANY COUNTRIES, THE AGE OF CRIMINALS IS GETTING LOWER. GIVE REASONS AND SOLUTIONS TO THE PROBLEM.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
330 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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