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In many countries, people of all ages are choosing to live either alone or with friends and their is no doubt that this is having an effect on the community that they live in.

In many countries, people of all ages are choosing to live either alone or with friends and their is no doubt that this is having an effect on the community that they live in. m8Pw8
Modern life means that many people live away from their homes either because they are studying or because their circumstances have changed, such as getting divorced. Also people often have to travel away from their hometown in order to get a job and if they are not married, this means they live alone or share with friends. So, whole town and cities are changing because of this. The negative effects of this are, firstly, on the environment as more houses and flats need to built and this is a drain on resources. At the same time, a social consequence is that people are living in isolation or if they fall out with their flat mates they can be in a difficult situation. These people became distant from their families and as often they just go to work and came home, they do not always participate in community life or help create a neighborhood where everyone knows each other. However, there are also positive effects of this way of living. Communities with a lot of single people shared houses trend to have a lot of young people. Many of these young people go out more so more shops and leisure activities develop in a town and they can have a vibrant social life. This can make for a very dynamic and innovative community. To conclude, the change in the way people are living is inevitable and in my view, the benefits for outweigh the disadvantages. Nevertheless, we will have to be careful that we do not produce communities with social problems caused by people feeling isolated.
Modern life means that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
away from their homes either
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they are studying or
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
their circumstances have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
, such as getting divorced.
Also
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
travel away from their hometown in order to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a job and if they are not married, this means they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
alone or share with friends.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, whole town and cities are changing
because of this
.

The
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of this are,
firstly
, on the environment as more
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
and flats need to built and this is a drain on resources. At the same time, a social consequence is that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living in isolation or if they fall out with their flat mates they can be in a difficult situation. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
became distant from their families and as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
they
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
go to work and came home, they do not always participate in community life or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
create a neighborhood where everyone knows each other.

However
, there are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects of this way of living. Communities with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
single
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
shared
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
houses
trend to have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
of these young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
go out more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
more shops and leisure activities develop in a
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
town and
they can have a vibrant social life. This can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
dynamic and innovative community.

To conclude
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
in the way
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are living is inevitable and in my view, the benefits for outweigh the disadvantages.
Nevertheless
, we will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
be careful that we do not produce communities with social problems caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
feeling isolated.
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IELTS essay In many countries, people of all ages are choosing to live either alone or with friends and their is no doubt that this is having an effect on the community that they live in.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
265 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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