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In Many Countries Only A Small Number Of People Earn Extremely High Salaries

In Many Countries Only A Small Number Of People Earn Extremely High Salaries LBr36
In some countries a handful of people earn significantly hefty remunerations and it is thought to be beneficial for the growth of the economy. However, a few people suggest that the government should limit / control it. I assert that salaries should be commensurate with an individual’s ability and need not be capped. A good salary is always a predominant factor for selecting a particular job in a company. Some jobs require specific academic qualifications, cognitive skills or even long working hours due to which employees in such positions are highly paid. When they work diligently and round the clock for these high paid positions then the productivity of the company upsurges. Resultantly, businesses flourish to peak level leading to the overall development of the country. By contrast, if salaries are capped, it will discourage people from working harder. If there is a limit to what you can earn no matter how hard you work, few people will want to put in their best efforts. On the other hand, if salary is determined by the capability of the worker, it provides a strong motivation not only to the person earning the money, but also to other employees. Thus, everyone is encouraged to work hard. Of course, higher earnings confined to a few hands increases inequality in the society. This also gives rise to feelings like jealousy and hatred. For example, people who do not earn much may feel hatred towards those who earn too much. In such situations, the crime rate is more likely to increase. However, capping the salaries is not the solution to this problem. Instead, the government should do whatever it can to improve the living standards of poor people. The government, for instance, should set minimum wages considering the cost of living in the country. This will ensure that everyone can earn enough to fulfil at least their basic requirements. And once the basic needs are met, people can work towards achieving more. In conclusion, although huge salaries confined to a few hands can give rise to inequality, it motivates everyone to work harder and thus benefit the growth of the country.
In
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
a handful of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
significantly
hefty remunerations and it is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
to be beneficial for the growth of the economy.
However
, a few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
suggest that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should limit / control it. I assert that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
should be commensurate with an individual’s ability and need not
be capped
.

A
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
is always a predominant factor for selecting a particular job in a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
jobs require specific academic qualifications, cognitive
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
or even long working hours due to which employees in such positions are
highly
paid. When they
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
diligently
and round the clock for these high paid positions then the productivity of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
upsurges.
Resultantly
, businesses flourish to peak level leading to the
overall
development of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. By contrast, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
are capped
, it will discourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
from working harder. If there is a limit to what you can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
no matter how
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, few
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
will want to put in their best efforts.
On the other hand
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salary
is determined
by the capability of the worker, it provides a strong motivation not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
to the person earning the money,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
to other employees.
Thus
, everyone
is encouraged
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
.

Of course
, higher earnings confined to a few hands increases inequality in the society. This
also
gives rise to feelings like jealousy and hatred.
For example
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who do not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
much may feel hatred towards those who
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
too much. In such situations, the crime rate is more likely to increase.
However
, capping the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
is not the solution to this problem.
Instead
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should do whatever it can to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the living standards of poor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
,
for instance
, should set minimum wages considering the cost of living in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. This will ensure that everyone can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earn
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to fulfil at least their basic requirements. And once the basic needs
are met
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
towards achieving more.

In conclusion
, although huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
salaries
confined to a few hands can give rise to inequality, it motivates everyone to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
harder and
thus
benefit the growth of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
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IELTS essay In Many Countries Only A Small Number Of People Earn Extremely High Salaries

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
356 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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