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In many countries, celebrities personal life are shown on the media. Some people say that they should accept it as a fame. Do you agree with this statement?

In many countries, celebrities personal life are shown on the media. Some people say that they should accept it as a fame. 6xm9j
In this present era, film actors claim that reporters bring their personal life front of the people, but some individuals opine that they should ignore the media and get it positively. Also, I disagree with this statement and will discuss my point of view with examples in the upcoming paragraphs. To commence with, celebrities have become an essential part of our world. Also, they entertain us by multifarious movies and shows, but they heard wrong information regarding their life on social media, then they cannot take it as a fame. For instance, sometimes these people get frustrated as their private life is shown on television or social media and they get hurt from various kinds of rumours regarding their lifestyle as they do not consider that media is getting the attention of public by interfering in their personal life. In addition, reporters lead to depression and health diseases of Bollywood personality as there are more chances to get a reduction of celebrity popularity. In addition, they commit suicide as media provide inaccurate information about their daily life. Moreover, some personalities are getting aware about media that how they get attention of public by presenting actor's personal life on social media or television and they do not take an interference as a fame. For instance, the Indian actress Kangna rant has heard some rumours about her private life, then she ignored reporters what they have said, but received it positively and replied them that famed individuals have always faced these kind of situation as people cannot see another person on top of them. In conclusion, Getting fame in Bollywood industry means opening your all life front of the public and it happens due to the media, but celebrities are given some space in their personal life so that they could also spend some moments freely in their life.
In this present era, film actors claim that reporters bring their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
front of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals opine that they should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignore
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
it
positively
.
Also
, I disagree with this statement and will discuss my point of view with examples in the upcoming paragraphs.

To commence with, celebrities have become an essential part of our world.
Also
, they entertain us by multifarious movies and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
they heard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
information regarding their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
on social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, then they cannot take it as a fame.
For instance
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
frustrated as their private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
is shown
on television or social
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
media and
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
hurt from various kinds of
Possible spelling mistake found.
rumours
regarding their lifestyle as they do not consider that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
is getting the attention of public by interfering in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
In addition
, reporters lead to depression and health diseases of Bollywood personality as there are more chances to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
a reduction of celebrity popularity.
In addition
, they commit suicide as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
provide inaccurate information about their daily life.

Moreover
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
personalities are getting aware about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
that how they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
attention of public by presenting actor's
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
on social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
or
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
television and
they do not take an interference as a fame.
For instance
, the Indian actress
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kangna
rant has heard
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
Possible spelling mistake found.
rumours
about her private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
, then she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ignored
reporters what they have said,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
received it
positively
and replied them that famed individuals have always faced
Did you mean "this kind" or "these kinds"?
these kind
of situation as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
another person on top of them.

In conclusion
, Getting fame in Bollywood industry means opening your all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
front of the public and it happens due to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
celebrities are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
space in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
personal
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that they could
also
spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
moments
freely
in their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
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IELTS essay In many countries, celebrities personal life are shown on the media. Some people say that they should accept it as a fame.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
307 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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