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In both employment and education some people work much harder than others?is it is always a good thing to work hard?

In both employment and education some people work much harder than others? is it is always a good thing to work hard? Kn121
Few people work harder than others do in both platforms that is education and occupation. There are enormous reasons that make people to work even harder. In other words, some may set a particular goal to achieve success, while others may be inspired by a renowned successful person. I totally agree, that extreme hard work will definitely lead to success. Firstly, there are plethora of students who are really intrested in there educational field and are driven to achieve a certain profession. For instance, In 2019, USA, University of California have estimated that 80%of pupils work hard and are ambitious for there dream job, while 15%of pupils performed good in order to have a certification but 5%of students are average compared to the others. On the other hand, apart from educational feild people even work hard for employment because they may have a chance of promotion. To illustrate, In 2020, Mexico, Researchers have found that 50% of multinational companies promote a worker by observing their intense hardworking quality. Some people often work hard for a better income but there are fewer chances for increasing income because they are provided according to the position one holds in their workplace. In conclusion, hard work is the key to success because without it one cannot achieve a better or extremely good grades both in occupation and education respectively. In other words, without hard work it is complex to have a bright future and hard work is always a right path rather than creating shortcuts that often leads to failure.
Few
people
work
harder than others do in both platforms
that is
education and occupation. There are enormous reasons that
make
people
to
work
even harder. In
other
words,
some
may set a particular goal to achieve success, while others may
be inspired
by a renowned successful person. I
totally
agree
, that extreme
hard
work
will definitely lead to success.

Firstly
, there are plethora of students who are
really
intrested
in
there
educational field and
are driven
to achieve a certain profession.
For instance
, In 2019, USA, University of California have estimated that 80%of pupils
work
hard
and are ambitious for there dream job, while 15%of pupils performed
good
in order to have a certification
but
5%of students are average compared to the others.

On the
other
hand, apart from educational
feild
people
even
work
hard
for employment
because
they may have a chance of promotion. To illustrate, In 2020, Mexico, Researchers have found that 50% of multinational
companies
promote a worker by observing their intense hardworking quality.
Some
people
often
work
hard
for a better income
but
there are fewer chances for increasing income
because
they
are provided
according to the position one holds in their workplace.

In conclusion
,
hard
work
is the key to success
because
without it one cannot achieve a better or
extremely
good
grades both in occupation and education
respectively
. In
other
words, without
hard
work
it is complex to have a bright future and
hard
work
is always a right path
rather
than creating shortcuts that
often
leads to failure.
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IELTS essay In both employment and education some people work much harder than others? is it is always a good thing to work hard?

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
256 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
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    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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