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Immigration has a major impact on the society. What are the main reasons of immigration? What consequences can it lead? v.10

Immigration has a major impact on the society. What are the main reasons of immigration? What consequences can it lead? v. 10
Throughout a history, with improved transportation and technology, migration has become increasingly common worldwide. This is happening due to umpteen causes which can have diverse effects on both the immigrant and the host country. This essay will discuss the major causes and effects of migration. Firstly, the majority of individuals migrate to developed nations because of better employment opportunities and a higher standard of living which are very less effective in their home country. For example, large numbers of people from countries like Sri Lanka and Indonesia immigrate to Australia for high salary jobs and good living conditions. Second reason link to the first, is that some part of a society wants to escape from the problems like religious and political persecution, because of this, they prefer another nation to live. A recent survey in India found out that some citizens prefer immigration because they get fed from their religion pressure. However, immigration has some negative effects. The major challenges immigrants face is about a job and a home. In other words, many of them have to struggle for an employment and a housing. The Canadian government said that around 65% of their unemployed citizens are newly migrate peoples. In addition, host country also gets affected and faces a problem like huge population surges. The higher population numbers placed strain on infrastructure and services within the host country. For instance, in 2006, Europe, the United States, and Asia were found to host the largest number of immigrants which cause overpopulation burden on government. In conclusion, migration has a wide impact on the society which is irrecoverable. Poverty, economy, religion, and politics are the main factors of immigration, which affects not only an individual, but also the nation in the terms of development and growth.
Throughout a history, with
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
transportation and technology, migration has become
increasingly
common worldwide. This is happening due to umpteen causes which can have diverse effects on both the immigrant and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
. This essay will discuss the major causes and effects of migration.

Firstly
, the majority of individuals migrate to developed nations
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of better employment opportunities and a higher standard of living which are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
less effective in their home
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For example
, large numbers of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
countries
like Sri Lanka and Indonesia immigrate to Australia for high salary jobs and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
living conditions. Second reason link to the
first
, is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
part of a society wants to escape from the problems like religious and political persecution,
because of this
, they prefer another nation to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
. A recent survey in India found out that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
citizens prefer immigration
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
fed from their religion pressure.

However
, immigration has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects. The major challenges immigrants face is about a job and a home.
In other words
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
of them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
struggle for an employment and a housing. The Canadian
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
said that around 65% of their unemployed citizens are
newly
Consider using a past participle here: "migrated".
migrate
peoples.
In addition
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
gets
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
and faces a problem like huge population surges. The higher population numbers placed strain on infrastructure and services within the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
country
.
For instance
, in 2006, Europe, the United States, and Asia
were found
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
host
the largest number of immigrants which cause overpopulation burden on
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
.

In conclusion
, migration has a wide impact on the society which is irrecoverable. Poverty, economy, religion, and politics are the main factors of immigration, which affects not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
an individual,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
the nation in the terms of development and growth.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay Immigration has a major impact on the society. What are the main reasons of immigration? What consequences can it lead? v. 10

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
294 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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