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If you want to choose to travel to one of two places that you have in mind, which of the following two ways do you prefer? -Finding information online about the two places-Asking friends who have been to the two places v.2

If you want to choose to travel to one of two places that you have in mind, which of the following two ways do you prefer? -Finding information online about the two places-Asking friends who have been to the two places v. 2
Since the dawn of humanity, there has been a heated controversy among people concerning reaching an agreement on what the best way of earning useful information about the place of traveling is. Traveling to the different places and giving time to yourself to release the stresses are the most important part of human beings' life. Since we all are suffering from living in a hectic lifestyle, dedicating some of our time to travel is the period of mind when all of the aspects including science can flourish and burgeon. Different people adopt various methods and policies for finding the most useful information about the places to travel among which asking from friends or searching on the internet are the most dominant elements that can have substantial and significant influences on anyone' s decision. I, personally, subscribe to the idea that searching online and finding information by using the internet is more helpful for a quite a few reasons, the two conspicuous ones of which are elaborated upon hereunder. The first pivotal reason which exhorted me to opt for this point of view is that it takes a lot of time to find a friend who was at the same two places before and in some cases, you may not be able to find one. I am of the conviction that internet and technology are marching in a galloping, seemingly inexorable rate, leaving us submissive to its dominion over our lives; therefore, if you try to search online just by typing " traveling to the place which you are eager to go" in the google website, you will find a lot of useful information related to that topic. Delving further into the issue, since in today world, everybody is sympathetic toward sharing their experiences with others by writing those in their website or personal pages in the social media, you will be able to know about either their experiences in the same places or the conditions and cultures attributed to those places. To elucidate on, finding the people who are your friends and also have traveled to those places is not easy and will take your time; consequently, no room is left for squandering the most precious gift of the life-time. The other equally compelling reason in corroborating my stance in this subject is that the information which is earned and acquired by asking your friends is not reliable information as it is intensely personal and if your personality is not close to your friends, you will not be able to benefit from them. To cast light, let' s suppose the condition and situation in which you are a person who loves traveling to places that have beautiful serenities, yet your friend is a person who enjoys traveling to historical places. It is incontrovertibly axiomatic that in that case you will not be capable of using your friend' s information and maybe you will conclude that your friend was lying to you which can be a crucial milestone. Consequently, it lends credence to the stance taken that asking information from your friends can arise the opportunity to lose your chance to travel to the place in which you can enjoy. On the other hand, since the internet is a wide place and if you keep track of its rate and up-to-date information, it can give a lot of impartial information by talking about the various merits and demerits of the places. Although you may not find very related information in some cases in which you are trying to go to unknown places, by ignoring these exceptions internet can augment your information and knowledge and help you to find the best place for the alleviation of your negative stresses. To sum up, after perusing all the above paragraphs, it can be concluded that obtaining information through the internet has paramount importance. In spite of the fact purchasing information by either asking friend or searching online have their own benefits and advantageous, not only can the internet help you more to enjoy your traveling time but also it can give some contributions to you to find different friends from all over the world by chatting with them about those places.
Since the dawn of humanity, there has been a heated controversy among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
concerning reaching an agreement on what the best way of earning useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
of traveling is. Traveling to the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
and giving
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to yourself to release the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stresses
are the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
part of human
Possible spelling mistake found.
beings&
#039; life. Since we all are suffering from living in a hectic lifestyle, dedicating
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to travel is the period of mind when
Consider using "all the".
all of the
aspects including science can flourish and burgeon.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
adopt various methods and policies for finding the most useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
to travel among which asking from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
or searching on the internet are the most dominant elements that can have substantial and significant influences on
Possible spelling mistake found.
anyone&
#039; s decision. I,
personally
, subscribe to the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that searching online and finding
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by using the internet is more helpful for a quite a few reasons, the two conspicuous ones of which
are elaborated
upon hereunder.

The
first
pivotal reason which exhorted me to opt for this point of view is that it takes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
was at the same two
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
and in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases, you may not be able to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
one. I am of the conviction that internet and technology are marching in a galloping,
seemingly
inexorable rate, leaving us submissive to its dominion over our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
;
therefore
, if you try to search online
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
by typing
Possible spelling mistake found.
&quot
; traveling to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
which you are eager to
Possible spelling mistake found.
go&quot
; in the
"Google" is a proper noun and needs to be capitalized.
google
website, you will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
useful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
related to that topic. Delving
further
into the issue, since in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
world, everybody is sympathetic toward sharing their experiences with others by writing those in their website or personal pages in the social media, you will be able to know about either their experiences in the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
or the conditions and cultures attributed to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. To elucidate on, finding the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
are your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and
also
have traveled to those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
is not easy and will take your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
;
consequently
, no room is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
for squandering the most precious gift of the life-time.

The other
equally
compelling reason in corroborating my stance in this subject is that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
which
is earned
and acquired by asking your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
is not reliable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
as it is
intensely
personal and if your personality is not close to your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, you will not be able to benefit from them. To cast light,
Possible spelling mistake found.
let&
#039; s suppose the condition and situation in which you are a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
loves
traveling to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
that have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
Possible spelling mistake found.
serenities
,
yet
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
is a person
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
who
enjoys traveling to historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. It is
incontrovertibly
axiomatic that
in that case
you will not be capable of using your
Possible spelling mistake found.
friend&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and maybe you will conclude that your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
was lying to you which can be a crucial milestone.
Consequently
, it lends credence to the stance taken that asking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
from your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
can arise the opportunity to lose your chance to travel to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
in which you can enjoy.
On the other hand
, since the internet is a wide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
and if you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
track
of its rate and up-to-date
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
, it can give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
impartial
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by talking about the various merits and demerits of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
. Although you may not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
related
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
cases in which you are trying to go to unknown
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
, by ignoring these
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "exceptions'" or "exception's"?
exceptions
internet can augment your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
and knowledge and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
the best
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
place
for the alleviation of your
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stresses
.

To sum up, after perusing all the above paragraphs, it can
be concluded
that obtaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
through the internet has paramount importance.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
In spite of
the fact purchasing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
information
by either asking
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
or searching online have their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
benefits and advantageous, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
can the internet
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
you more to enjoy your traveling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
it can give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
contributions to you to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
find
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
from all over the world by chatting with them about those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
places
.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
56Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
11Mistakes

IELTS essay If you want to choose to travel to one of two places that you have in mind, which of the following two ways do you prefer? -Finding information online about the two places-Asking friends who have been to the two places v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
697 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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