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I love my house in my peaceful hometown

I love my house in my peaceful hometown pKW5y
Many people dream of having a modern house located in the city. However, I love my house in my peaceful hometown. It was in a nice, quiet rural area with vast paddy fields and rivers. My house has only 2 floors and is not spacious, but the space is enough for a family to live cosily. My father painted the house blue, which is my favourite colour. It has a living room, a kitchen, a bathroom, and two bedrooms. All of those are equipped with modern facilities like an electric fire, a computer, an oven, a washing machine, and air conditioning. My favorite room was the living room, which was mostly pink and had a small sofa, a television about 50 inches long with a beautiful picture. After dinner, my father will turn on the television, choose a great movie and we watch it happily. There was also a small garden in front of my house where my parents planted vegetables, flowers, and trees. The garden always gave me the feeling of nature and peace. To me, my house is a place where I feel the best in the world.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
dream of having a modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
located in the city.
However
, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
in my peaceful hometown. It was in a nice, quiet rural area with vast paddy fields and rivers.

My
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
2 floors and is not spacious,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
the space is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
for a family to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
Possible spelling mistake found.
cosily
. My father painted the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
blue, which is my
Possible spelling mistake. 'favourite' is British English.
favourite
Possible spelling mistake. 'colour' is British English.
colour
. It has a living room, a kitchen, a bathroom, and two bedrooms. All of those
are equipped
with modern facilities like an electric fire, a computer, an oven, a washing machine, and air conditioning.

My favorite room was the living room, which was
mostly
pink and had a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
sofa, a television about
Writing for an international audience? Consider adding the metric equivalent.
50 inches
long with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
picture. After dinner, my father will turn on the television, choose a great
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
movie and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
it
happily
.

There was
also
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
garden in front of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
where my parents planted vegetables, flowers, and trees. The garden always gave me the feeling of nature and peace.

To me, my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
house
is a place where I feel the best in the world.

IELTS essay I love my house in my peaceful hometown

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
190 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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