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HOW WE SHOULD STOP WASTING OUR TIME ON USELESS THINGS

HOW WE SHOULD STOP WASTING OUR TIME ON USELESS THINGS BwpeX
We should know we’re doing a numerical of valueless things such as social media, gaming, relaxing on watching television. I would find myself wasting time on things I knew were useless. To make it worse, I even wasted time when I knew I had important work to do. Also, I do a lot of wasting time on browsing, however I had known it was just a waste of my time. Most of the social networks today work on Machine Learning. Based on your usage, social media knows exactly what you like and dislike. So, even you browsed to Youtube website for do some assignments, instead of doing that, you probably watched the useless videos for entertaining. When you’re doing the things which is you dislike, then it’ll be such kind of wasting your times either. The most effective way to stop wasting time is to work on something you love. For me, I like to do crochet which makes my mind in peace. Instead of doing a lot of unproductive jobs, I make my sweater to wear on useful days. For example, if you want to run a business, you can start making small progress towards your dream even with a full-time job. I produce my hand-made crochet things to improve my income and forwards the things I would like to do. Social media uses a hook to keep you hooked. A hook is nothing but a trigger that urges you to come back and use the site. Also me, I have been hooking up from social media like Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Line, etc. When a notification causes you to check your phone, it means the phone controls your behavior. Thus, you should stop wasting time on social media. I had a bad habit of leaving my browser window open with many tabs. I would also have multiple browser windows open, each with over 10 tabs. If I have a lot of assigns to do, I do open multiple of tabs on window, to find the sources depend on my homework’s. As a conclusion, we do need to browse the websites for news, politics which is going on nowadays. But, do the things you really need to do if you have to do these for emergency. If you start with the intention of getting rid of all your time-wasting habits in a week, you will give up before you even get started.
We should know we’re
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
The phrase 'a numerical of' is not correct. Use a noun, not an adjective, between 'a' and 'of'.
a numerical of
valueless things such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
, gaming, relaxing on watching television. I would find myself
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on things I knew were useless. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it worse, I even wasted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
when I knew I had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
work to do.
Also
, I do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on browsing,
however
I had known it was
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
a waste of my
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. Most of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
networks
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
work on Machine Learning. Based on your usage,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
knows exactly what you like and dislike.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, even you browsed to
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
website for do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
assignments,
instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
that, you
probably
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watched
the useless videos for entertaining.

When you’re
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
the things which is you dislike, then it’ll be such kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wasting
your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
either. The most effective way to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is to work on something you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
. For me, I like to do crochet which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
my mind in peace.
Instead
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
doing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
unproductive jobs, I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
my sweater to wear on useful days.
For example
, if you want to run a business, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
progress towards your dream even with a full-time job. I produce my hand-made crochet things to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
my income and forwards the things I would like to do.

Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
uses
a hook to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
you hooked. A hook is nothing
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
a trigger that urges you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
back and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the site.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Also
me, I have been hooking up from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
like Instagram, Facebook, Twitter, Line, etc. When a notification causes you to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
check
your phone, it means the phone controls your behavior.
Thus
, you should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
wasting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
media.

I had a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
habit of leaving my browser window open with
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
tabs. I would
also
have multiple browser windows open, each with over 10 tabs. If I have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
assigns to do, I do open multiple of tabs on window, to find the sources depend on my homework’s.

As a conclusion, we do need to browse the websites for news, politics which is going on nowadays.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
, do the things you
really
need to do if you
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
do these for emergency. If you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
with the intention of getting rid of all your time-wasting habits in a week, you will give up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
you even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
.
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IELTS essay HOW WE SHOULD STOP WASTING OUR TIME ON USELESS THINGS

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
402 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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