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How the school can improve the school library

How the school can improve the school library LqXx3
School library improvement Introduction Our school is planning to improve the school library. This report will include some students’ comments and some ideas to improve the library. Findings A lot of students said that our school library is very beautiful with a good view of the school garden and the pool. Some others said that the internet is fast so they can download the work from their teachers very quickly. On the other hand, some students complained that the library is quite noisy in the break time because of students playing around so they cannot concentrate on their work. In addition, the bathroom is quite far from the library, so it takes lots of time to go to the bathroom. Conclusion Overall, we can see that the school library is quite a good place for the students can relax and do their homework. However, lots of students will play around in the break time so I suggest the school can stick some soundproof foam to the wall so we can reduce the noise. Moreover, the school can build a bathroom near the library so the students can go there easily.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
School
library improvement

Introduction

Our
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school
is planning to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
library. This report will include
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some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students’
comments and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
the library.

Findings

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
A lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
said that our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
library is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
with a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
view of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
garden and the pool.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
others said that the internet is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they can download the work from their teachers
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
quickly
.
On the other hand
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
complained that the library is quite noisy in the break time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of
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students
playing around
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
they cannot concentrate on their work.
In addition
, the bathroom is quite far from the library,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
it takes lots of time to go to the bathroom.

Conclusion

Overall
, we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
library is quite a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
place for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can relax and do their homework.
However
, lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
will play around in the break time
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I suggest the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can stick
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
soundproof foam to the wall
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
we can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the noise.
Moreover
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
school
can build a bathroom near the library
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can go there
easily
.
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IELTS essay How the school can improve the school library

Essay
  American English
7 paragraphs
190 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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