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HOW INSTANT NOODLES ARE MANUFACTURED.

HOW INSTANT NOODLES ARE MANUFACTURED. g5eQ1

THERE ARE EIGHT PHASE IN THIS MANUFACTURE. FIRST, WE SHOULD TRANSPORT THE STORAGE SILOS USING TRUCK. IN THIS TRUCK, THERE ARE A LOT OF AMOUNT OF FLOUR. SECOND, THE MACHINE MIXES THE FLOUR WITH WATER AND OIL. THEN, THE STUFF IS SENT ON THE ROLLERS. THIRD, THE STUFF BECOME FLAT. FOURTH, THE DOUGH SHEETS IS CUT AND BECOME DOUGH STRIPS. FIFTH, THE STRIPS CHANGE THE SHAPE. THEY BECOME NOODLE DISCS. WE FINALLY CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT THE MANUFACTURE ARE MAKING. SIXTH, NOODLES DISCS ARE COOKED.

THERE ARE EIGHT Possible agreement error. Did you mean "phases"?Phases
PHASE
 IN THIS MANUFACTURE.

FIRST
, WE SHOULD TRANSPORT THE STORAGE SILOS USING TRUCK. IN THIS TRUCK, THERE ARE Possible agreement error. The noun AMOUNT seems to be countable; consider using: "a LOT of amounts".A LOT of amounts
A LOT OF AMOUNT
 OF FLOUR.

SECOND, THE MACHINE MIXES THE FLOUR WITH WATER AND OIL. THEN, THE STUFF IS This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :transmitted
SENT
 ON THE ROLLERS.

THIRD, THE STUFF BECOME FLAT.

FOURTH, THE DOUGH SHEETS IS This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :minimize
CUT
 AND BECOME DOUGH STRIPS.

FIFTH, THE STRIPS This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :alteradjust
CHANGE
 THE SHAPE. THEY BECOME NOODLE DISCS. WE FINALLY
 CAN UNDERSTAND WHAT THE MANUFACTURE ARE MAKING.

SIXTH, NOODLES DISCS ARE COOKED
. 

IELTS essay HOW INSTANT NOODLES ARE MANUFACTURED.

Essay

American English

7 paragraphs

84 words

This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1

4.0

Overall Band Score

Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5

Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
?
One main idea per paragraph
Include an introduction and conclusion
Support main points with an explanation and then an example
Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
Vary your linking phrases using synonyms

Lexical Resource: 6.5

Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes

Grammatical Range: 7.0

Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
Check your writing for errors

Task Achievement: 5.5

Answer all parts of the question
?
Present relevant ideas
Fully explain these ideas
Support ideas with relevant, specific examples

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