How do you feel being alone?

There wasn’t any place left for me to work as a programmer. Simply because all the workplaces available were tedious and repetitive, they all required a minimum of my skill and had no good thing in it. I wasn’t getting any satisfaction nor happiness. I went one to another, between many companies and software developers. The majority offered a good salary and workplace, but none of them offered something which would interest me, something which would test my ability. I wanted to challenge myself, experience my true potential. All the dissatisfactory and meaninglessness were making me obnoxious. But everything changed, I have found true meaning, now I’m an astronaut. It all started when I, an inferior with no job or with a conscious mind or idea about how to keep living, was shoulder surfing someone at the park. It was a beautiful day during midsummer, a small pond located at its centre, perfectly cut lawn, surrounded with trees blocking the noise pollution from the city, the park astounding. There weren’t many people but there was a girl who was sitting on a bench working on her laptop. She had this futuristic white-blueish strange-looking coloured laptop with an alien keyboard which was brightly lit with the same colour as the laptop. I had my mind blown when I saw her typing on it, she seemed to had been coding a program. As I remember, she was typing like 150 words per minute, my eyes couldn’t even catch up with her dashing fingers. She was checking what she had done every minute or so. Inspecting every aspect of it in different forms and dimensions. I wondered whether she was programming some sort of sci-fi space game because the thing she was working on seemed to be a spacecraft, so I walked up in front of her. She had nerdy looking glasses and clothes on but was as beautiful as an angel, she was enchanting to look at. I nervously greeted and asked her about the space game. She was stone-faced, she didn’t show any form of emotion or expression after someone, whom shoulder surfed her a while, walked up in front of her asked a random question. After greeting back, she replied, “Well, you can say that but it’s quite real”. Her voice was gorgeous, it was perfectly matched with her pretty face. I was a bit confused, because I was driven by her voice, and asked her for clarification. She seemed to have had grown a clue that I was something of a programmer too, due to my unfashionable and ignorant clothing: glasses, mismatched V-neck sweater and shirt, jeans, and cheap running shoes –it was obvious. Shortly after, she answered, “I work at NASA…I am the chief programmer for the Mars V mission. What do you do? ”. I grew interest about it, and I said to her that I was a programmer too, a long time experienced one. I was about to ask another question, but she asked me “Are you currently employed? ”, I was bewildered by that question because we had just met and had a conversation that lasted a minute or so, I answered “No”. Her face lit up, her eyes wide opened, and said “Really? ! ”. Her next sentence explained why she reacted as if I was a person whom she searched for her whole life. From what she had said, NASA was searching for a programmer needed for the fifth Mars mission crew. She asked me whether I had an interest in it. I thought to myself why not give it a try, from looking back, it really wasn’t something you would give it “a try”. We took the first flight to Houston, Texas, and went to NASA’s Johnson Space Center. At first sight, every building was extra-ordinary, though the buildings were unusual and fictional looking they felt very real, not in a sense that they were in existence but rather in a sense of authenticity. They were not built just to look different than others, they were appealing to look at, you could feel the effort, skill, and creativity put into them. I met with many people there, they were in a hurry so they immediately put me in an astronaut training program. First, they took numerous tests, examinations, and interviews. I was in good shape and had a healthy mentality, I passed every single one of them. Usual astronaut training takes at least 2 whole years, but they shortened it into 40 weeks because there wasn’t enough time. The first week was amazing, I felt alive, it felt almost as I wasn’t living until then, I could feel every part of my body reaching its limits, even the instructional lessons were exciting. I was confident and enthusiastic about the upcoming weeks, but I was wrong. My body had reached its limits in the preceding week, the following weeks were just a nightmare. The strenuous activities, lessons, experiments got more difficult every week, not even mentioning the soreness of every muscle of mine. It was hell on earth, or hell in the sky considering High-G training. Exasperating mid-air training involves constant changes in G-Force, as the G’s increased every part of my body would become heavier and heavier. Reaching 1G back was like entering heaven, I would feel relieved and free, as well as my crew considering their delightful faces. Me and everyone else did nothing but sit on our seats and yet it was overwhelmingly exhausting. After each flight, I would feel extremely nauseous and fatigued. Weeks passed as days passed, I was getting closer and closer to becoming an astronaut. Because I was heavily dissatisfied and had grown a disgust of repetitive and easy things in the past, I was enjoying the way of becoming an astronaut. The difficulty it offers, the pain it gives, and the mind-challenging tasks were all intense. I had truly found what I was born to, what I have been trying to find my whole life.