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how cultures have been changed recently

how cultures have been changed recently 3gWpw
Culture is an important factor of living in a place and it is one of the most challenges for immigrants. Changing cultures toward its beneficial effects can live in a place more relaxed and it makes life smoother. Firstly, Culture can change by a number of factors like immigrartion, Technology, Transportations and so on. For example immigrants can modify a plethora of new style of living based on the place they born. Although immigration has numerous beneficial and adverse aspects in the world but it was proved that the positive effects are more viable than adverse aspects. Secondly, Transportation and easy community among people can get people more in common. Due to the long-term aspects of easy going behavior, the countries atmosphere will be happier and cooler. Finally, Changing culture can make living easier and change the process of marring and also be very helpful for all citizen and immigrants. In the other hand try to vary between old cultures and life style and new style may make a bad culture shock. By that I mean, differentiate between previous cultures and today's ones would be problematic. In conclusion, Try to change and modify new things in a country is obvious, however some of people get anxious and more others get used to it and live differently afterward. Because of technology changes and fast growing of social communications, every thing changes incredibly fast, furthermore we should get used to this variation happens every day and try to be updated based on last modification.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
is an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
factor of living in a place and it is one of the most challenges for immigrants. Changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
toward its beneficial effects can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
in a place more relaxed and it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
life smoother.
Firstly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Culture
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
by a number of factors like
Possible spelling mistake found.
immigrartion
, Technology, Transportations and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
For example
immigrants can modify a plethora of new style of living based on the place they
Possible grammatical error. You used a past participle without using any required verb ('be' or 'have'). Did you mean "bore"?
born
. Although immigration has numerous beneficial and adverse aspects in the world
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it
was proved
that the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects are more viable than adverse aspects.
Secondly
, Transportation and easy community among
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
more in common. Due to the long-term aspects of easy going behavior, the
Apostrophe might be missing. Did you mean "countries'" or "country's"?
countries
atmosphere will be happier and cooler.
Finally
, Changing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
living easier and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
the process of marring and
also
be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
helpful for all citizen and immigrants. In the other hand try to vary between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and life style and new style may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
bad
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
shock. By that I mean, differentiate between previous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
's ones would be problematic.
In conclusion
, Try to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
and modify new things in a country is obvious,
however
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
anxious and more others
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to it and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
differently
afterward.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Because
of technology
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
growing of social communications, every thing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
changes
incredibly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
,
furthermore
we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to this variation happens every day and try to
be updated
based on last modification.
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IELTS essay how cultures have been changed recently

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
252 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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