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health problems and junk foods

health problems and junk foods Mm8Ro
There are many factors that threat human health in the modern world. Examples include global warming, smoking, drugs, unhealthy foods, and beverages. Harmful foods are among these factors. So that, people get overweight by eating these foods. Personally, I strongly agree with the idea that the production of such foods should be controlled. I intend to support my views with my arguments. Firstly, Scientists say that junk food is harmful to people’s health. In addition to the harmful effects of junk food can help in reduce its use. The fact, is that people don’t actually know what go in the make of fast food. Fast foods are high calories and low in nutrition. These foods are rich in harmful substances such as fat, sugar or etc. All these factors can cause heart disease, cancer, diabetes, and obesity. Obesity is most of the major problems in the world todays. İn my opinion, if people really understand the harm of these foods. Necessarily they will partially reduce those foods. On the other hand, junk food is very cheap, tasty, and readily available. So that, some people don’t waste time in the kitchen for a long time. At the same time, in modern times, along with adults, junk foods are widespread among children. This poses a serious threat to their future lives and health. To summarise, fast food is harmful but still people eat. However at present, it see unclear whether this can be controlled. Thus, as well as thousands of people working in this field, it has an important position as a manufacture sector.
There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
factors that threat human health in the modern world. Examples include global warming, smoking, drugs, unhealthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
, and beverages.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Harmful
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are among these factors.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
that,
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people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
overweight by eating these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
Personally
, I
strongly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that the production of such
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
should
be controlled
. I intend to support my views with my arguments.

Firstly
, Scientists say that
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junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
health.
In addition
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
its
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
. The fact, is that
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people
don’t actually know what go in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Fast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are high calories and low in nutrition. These
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are rich in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
substances such as
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fat
, sugar or etc. All these factors can cause heart disease, cancer, diabetes, and obesity. Obesity is most of the major problems in the world
Possible spelling mistake found.
todays
.
Possible spelling mistake found.
İn
my opinion, if p
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eople
really
understand the harm of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
.
Necessarily
they will
partially
r
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
educe
those foods.

O
n the other hand,
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junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is v
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ery
c
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
heap,
tasty, and
readily
available. S
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o
that, s
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
ome
p
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eople
don’t waste
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time
in the kitchen for a long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. At the same
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time
, in modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
, along with adults,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foods
are widespread among children. This poses a serious threat to their future l
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ives
and health.

To
Possible spelling mistake. 'summarise' is British English.
summarise
, f
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
ast
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
harmful
b
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
ut
s
till
p
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eople
eat. H
owever
at present, it s
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ee
unclear whether this can
be controlled
. T
hus,
a
s well
as thousands of p
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
eople
working in this field, it has an i
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
mportant
position as a manufacture sector.
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IELTS essay health problems and junk foods

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
262 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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