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Technology change the people relationship

Technology change the people relationship Kn9M3
People are divided in their opinion regard to technology. Technology has beneficial and adverse impact in our modern life. A number of people believe that technology adversely affect to people relationship. In this essay I will discuss the both adverse or beneficial development of changed technology. To begin with, there are a number of considerable pros. Firstly, today is modern era due to we can communicate any corner in the world without any disturbance and independently through the automation. For instance, past days people used to send their message through the post man. It takes too longer time due to the fact there is physical travel to reach their destination. Furthermore, in present days same letter could be delivered instantly across the technology such as Facebook, twitter, Instagram, WhatsApp, e-mail. Technology is the one of the most powerful creations in the world. However, a number of cons are technology made relationship virtual and feeling fewer people are busy every time with social media that have affected their family, and they can not give time to their family. Also, youngster give more time to chat on social sites. In addition, today technology is addicted for the juvenile social media, computer game, messaging, creating websites can all be addicted. Consequently, increase violence, crime, data stolen, sexual harassment. Also, technology promote young generation habitual drug, makes a plethora of fake friends. Modern technology make people lazy and fully depend on the technology. In a nutshell, technology help us update with a time.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are divided
in their opinion regard to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
has beneficial and adverse impact in our modern life. A number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
adversely
affect to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
relationship. In this essay I will discuss the both adverse or beneficial development of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
technology.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, there are a number of considerable pros.
Firstly
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
is modern era due to we can communicate any corner in the world without any disturbance and
independently
through the automation.
For instance
, past days
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
their message through the post
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
. It takes too longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
due to the fact there is physical travel to reach their destination.
Furthermore
, in present days same letter could
be delivered
instantly
across the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
such as Facebook, twitter, Instagram, WhatsApp, e-mail.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
is the one of the most powerful creations in the world.

However
, a number of cons are
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
made relationship virtual and feeling fewer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are busy every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with social media that have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
their family, and they can not give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to their family.
Also
, youngster give more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to chat on social sites.
In addition
,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
is addicted
for the juvenile social media, computer game, messaging, creating websites can all
be addicted
.
Consequently
, increase violence, crime, data stolen, sexual harassment.
Also
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
promote young generation habitual drug,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
a plethora of fake friends. Modern
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
lazy and
fully
depend on the technology.

In a nutshell,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us update with a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
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IELTS essay Technology change the people relationship

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
249 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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