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Having more money and less free time is better than earning less money and having more free time. Discuss both views and state your opinion? v.17

In this world of globalization, competition and run for money are constant things in everybody’s mind. Some people give more importance to wealth as compared with time, while others believe that having more free time if better off than having more income. In this essay, we will discuss both views in detail and I will give my opinion on the same. First and foremost, people who think money is the route of all evil, they don’t know the sweetness of it or probably grapes are bitter for them because they don’t have any. Today’s era when everything is just one step away if you have huge bank balance, the significance of money is only going up because more and more people understanding the value of it at the time of children’s education, leisure trip abroad or elder’s healthcare etc. Therefore, humans advocate that having access of money may be at the cost of spending more time earning it is always preferred over vice-versa. On the other hand, old-age people whose priorities are different from those of young people have different way of thinking and give more importance to living a life peacefully rather than running behind printed papers which others call it notes. Consequently, they are on other side of fence and say that it is better to have more time in hand and lower amount of cash inflow/salary in order to enjoy the life at its fullest. In a nutshell, though some people consider that having higher amount of funds and lower free time is better, many also believe in other way. In my opinion, richness can resolve any problem of life and spending few extra hours to earn more bucks is always better.
In this world of globalization, competition and run for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
are constant things in everybody’s mind.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
give more importance to wealth as compared with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, while others believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
more free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
off than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
more income. In this essay, we will discuss both views in detail and I will give my opinion on the same.

First
and foremost,
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people
who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is the route of all evil, they don’t know the sweetness of it or
probably
grapes are bitter for them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they don’t have any.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
’s era when everything is
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just
one step away if you have huge bank balance, the significance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
going up
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
understanding the value of it at the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
of children’s education, leisure trip abroad or elder’s healthcare etc.
Therefore
, humans advocate that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
access of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
may be at the cost of spending more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
earning it is always preferred over vice-versa.

On the
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other
hand,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
-age
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people
whose priorities are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
from those of young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
way of thinking and give more importance to living a life
peacefully
rather
than running behind printed papers which others call it notes.
Consequently
, they are on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
side of fence and say that it is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
to have more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in hand and lower amount of cash inflow/salary in order to enjoy the life at its fullest.

In a nutshell, though
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
consider that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
having
higher amount of funds and lower free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
also
believe in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
way. In my opinion, richness can resolve any problem of life and spending few extra hours to earn more bucks is always
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
better
.
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To have another language is to possess a second soul.
Charlemagne

IELTS essay Having more money and less time is better than earning less money and having more free time.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
285 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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