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Happiness is considered very important in life. Discuss the reason why people define happiness differently and how to obtain happiness? v.26

Happiness is considered very important in life. Discuss the reason why people define happiness differently and how to obtain happiness? v. 26
People hold different opinions on the nature of happiness and the way to approach it. While happiness is difficult to define since it means something different to each individual person, there are several common ways that people could share with regard to experiencing happiness. It is apparent that the perception of happiness varies dramatically from each person depending on their individual characteristics and environmental factors. With those who wish to pursue a successful career, promotion opportunities or moving up the career ladder offer them job satisfaction and feeling of happiness. For others who desire to contribute to a community something positive, it is much more important to find work which is interesting and enjoyable. At the same time, the greatest thing for someone is to devote their time and energy to care their family and nurture children in which the success of their family members is the most supportive source in their life. Although it seems almost impossible to describe exactly the concept of happiness, there are several basic ways to achieve it. Firstly, it is essential that our basic survival needs, for example, a safe place or having enough food to eat, must surely be met, ensuring people to have a reasonable quality of life. Secondly, it is common knowledge that sharing interests and experiences with our family and friends plays an important role in helping us relieve stress and balance our daily life. This would bring frequent positive emotions such as joy, love, contentment or excitement, encouraging people to over come challenges. In addition, other key factor could be setting reachable targets that individuals would take each step in order to increase their material and spiritual values like money, health, power or fame. In conclusion, although the personal nature of happiness makes it difficult to describe, most people would have several common ways to approach it.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
hold
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions on the nature of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
and the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
way
to approach it. While
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
is difficult to define since it means something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
to each individual person, there are several common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
could share with regard to experiencing happiness.

It is apparent that the perception of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
varies
dramatically
from each person depending on their individual characteristics and environmental factors. With those who wish to pursue a successful career, promotion opportunities or moving up the career ladder offer them job satisfaction and feeling of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
. For others who desire to contribute to a community something
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
, it is much more
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
to find work which is interesting and enjoyable. At the same time, the greatest thing for someone is to devote their time and energy to care their family and nurture children in which the success of their family members is the most supportive source in their life.

Although it seems almost impossible to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
exactly the concept of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
, there are several basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to achieve it.
Firstly
, it is essential that our basic survival needs,
for example
, a safe place or having
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
food to eat,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
surely
be met
, ensuring
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have a reasonable quality of life.
Secondly
, it is common knowledge that sharing interests and experiences with our family and friends plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in helping us relieve
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
and balance our daily life. This would bring frequent
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
emotions such as joy,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
love
, contentment or excitement, encouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to over
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
challenges.
In addition
, other key factor could be setting reachable targets that individuals would take each step in order to increase their material and spiritual values like money, health, power or fame.

In conclusion
, although the personal nature of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
happiness
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
it difficult to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
describe
, most
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
would have several common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ways
to approach it.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
0Mistakes
The conquest of learning is achieved through the knowledge of languages.
Roger Bacon

IELTS essay Happiness is considered very important in life. Discuss the reason why people define happiness differently and how to obtain happiness? v. 26

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
308 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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