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Groups or organizations are an important part of some people's lives. Why are groups or organizations important to people? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your answer. v.6

Groups or organizations are an important part of some people's lives. Why are groups or organizations important to people? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your answer. v. 6
Being one of the most proliferated known social sciences issue, the critical role of groups or organizations cannot be neglected. It is crystal clear that the initial stage to found a society is a group formation. As everyone probably knows, a society composes of different groups. Similarly, the organization composes of the a group or groups to do the assigned tasks. To elaborate more on the importance of groups or organizations as the main topic of the assay, the following reasons and examples will be presented. First and foremost, regrading the limitation of the individual ability, the achievement of every particular tasks cannot be done individually. As previous excavated findings reveal, the tendency of humans for hunting in a group was more compared with hunting individually in variety zones of the world. It goes without saying that the probability to succeed, in a commonplace hunt, enhances remarkably. The variety of traces, different hunting tools and more interestingly, the paintings on the walls of some caves endorse this subject. Thus, in the prehistoric activities of humans, in addition to the requirement of more security for hunting, the enhancement of prosperous can be attributed as main reasons for the groups formation. It is crystal clear that the formation of groups in earlier life of humans was based on the providing of their essential requirements. Regarding psychological viewpoint, different characteristics of the individuals particularly the thinking ability and considering the significant fact that different people think differently, persuade individual to aggregate different ideas for making much better decisions. Thus, the groups can be contributed as an assembly of the different ideas. This subject can be attributed as the another primary reason of the importance of groups and organization to people. Taking all these perspectives into account, the importance of groups or organizations to people derives from the essential requirements of people life including the security, decision making, and achievement of high goals. To my best knowledge, a group or organization is small part of a whole society. If a group come cross a disturbance, the whole society may encounter some difficulties in the near future.
Being one of the most proliferated known social sciences issue, the critical role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
cannot
be neglected
. It is crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the initial stage to found a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
is a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
formation. As everyone
probably
knows, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
composes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
.
Similarly
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
composes of
Maybe you need to remove one determiner so that only "the" or "a" is left.
the a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
to do the assigned tasks. To elaborate more on the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
as the main topic of the assay, the following reasons and examples will
be presented
.

First
and foremost, regrading the limitation of the individual ability, the achievement of every particular tasks cannot
be done
individually
. As previous excavated findings reveal, the tendency of humans for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
in a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
was more compared with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
individually
in variety zones of the world. It goes without saying that the probability to succeed, in a commonplace hunt, enhances
remarkably
. The variety of traces,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
tools and more
interestingly
, the paintings on the walls of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
caves endorse this subject.
Thus
, in the prehistoric activities of humans,
in addition
to the requirement of more security for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
hunting
, the enhancement of prosperous can
be attributed
as main reasons for the
Possible typo: apostrophe is missing. Did you mean "groups'" or "group's"?
groups
formation. It is crystal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
that the formation of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
in earlier life of humans
was based
on the providing of their essential requirements.

Regarding psychological viewpoint,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
characteristics of the individuals
particularly
the thinking ability and considering the significant fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
differently
, persuade individual to aggregate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
for making much better decisions.
Thus
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
can
be contributed
as an assembly of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
different
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
ideas
. This subject can
be attributed
as the another primary reason of the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Taking all these perspectives into account, the importance of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
groups
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organizations
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
If 'people' is plural here, don't use the third-person singular verb.
derives
from the essential requirements of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
life including the security,
This word is normally spelled with hyphen.
decision making
, and achievement of high goals. To my best knowledge, a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
organization
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
part of a whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
. If a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
group
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
come
cross a disturbance, the whole
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
society
may encounter
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
difficulties in the near future.
6Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
34Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes

IELTS essay Groups or organizations are an important part of some people's lives. Why are groups or organizations important to people? Use specific reasons and examples to explain your answer. v. 6

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
352 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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