Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Govt investment in the art such as music and and theatre is waste of money

Govt investment in the art such as music and and theatre is waste of money eKAaA
Many people believe that providing funds to to various fields of art it is not worth full, whether the ministry should spend money on various activities beneficial for individuals but I disagree with this opinion and my views are justified below. Firstly, the artwork like music and theatre portray various historical incidents and moments. Earlier, during lack of technology's people use this kills for exhibiting their feelings and emotions which is still continued till now-a-day. Secondly, this skills also help us to relax our mind in the form of meditation. The busy schedule of human in present Era needs a short break which can boost their mind. So this is a excellent method which help us to calm ourselves. Lastly, it is a better way of earning for some individuals and a reliable way for proper taxation too. It play an important role in helping fight against intolerance of different culture racism and other cognitive problems. To sum up, I don't agree with opinion as art is a therapy which heals us from inside to outside that is from our soul to our body.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that providing funds
Possible typo: you repeated a word
to to
various fields of art it is not worth full, whether the ministry should spend money on various activities beneficial for individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I disagree with this opinion and my views
are justified
below.
Firstly
, the artwork like music and
Possible spelling mistake. 'theatre' is British English.
theatre
portray various historical incidents and moments. Earlier, during lack of technology's
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this kills for exhibiting their feelings and emotions which is
still
continued till
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
-a-day.
Secondly
,
Did you mean "these"?
this
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to relax our mind in the form of meditation. The busy schedule of human in present Era needs a short break which can boost their mind.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
this is
Use "an" instead of 'a' if the following word starts with a vowel sound, e.g. 'an article', 'an hour'
a
excellent method which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to calm ourselves.
Lastly
, it is a better way of earning for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
individuals and a reliable way for proper taxation too. It
Did you mean "plays"?
play
an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in helping fight against intolerance of
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
culture racism and other cognitive problems. To sum up, I don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with opinion as art is a therapy which heals us from inside to outside
that is
from our soul to our body.

IELTS essay Govt investment in the art such as music and and theatre is waste of money

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
184 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts





Get more results for topic:
  • Govt investment in the art such as music and and theatre is waste of money