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Governments spend a lot of money on public celebrations such as national holidays and public festivals. Some people say that the government spends too much on this and that they should use this money on other useful things. Do you agree or disagree. v.1

Governments spend a lot of money on public celebrations such as national holidays and public festivals. Some people say that the government spends too much on this and that they should use this money on other useful things. v. 1
Needless to say, pubic celebrations and history plays a vital role in each and everyone's life. Thus. high authorities invest large amount of money on public events. However, few individuals believe that the regime had better spend some funds of this money on other useful things. I agree with this perception and this essay will intend to delve on my point of views regarding this prospective in tje subsequent clauses. There are plethora of reasons behind this trend that why government spends a lot of money on public celebrations like national holidays and public festivals. To begin with, there are some dates which brings worth place in each and everyone's life as such dates are relatedto our history. To examplify, 15th august, 1945 is very vaulable date in our life because on that time, our country got freedom thanks to struggler as martyrs Bhagat Singh, Rajguru, Sukhdev, they sacrifice their lives for country. Furthermore, another important reason is that it is best way to spreading knowledge about history and cuture along with tradition among new generation celebrating public events like national holidays and pubic festivals, they may get knowledge about their past happenings which can help to them in order to associate with their history. Apart from this, they can gain knowledge about how our ancestors scrificed their lives for independence of our country. That is why, high authorities spend lion's share of money on public ceremonies. For instance, republic day, independence day and so on. Hence, having ruminated aforestation information, it can be concluded that though public festivals plays a paramount role in human'life but regime ought to invest some bucks on another purposes. According to my point of view, another useful purposes also play an important role in general public's life.
Needless to say,
pubic
celebrations and
history
plays a vital role in each and
everyone
's
life
.
Thus
.
high
authorities invest large amount of
money
on
public
events
.
However
, few individuals believe that the regime had better spend
some
funds of this
money
on other useful things. I
agree
with this perception and this essay will intend to delve on my point of views regarding this prospective in
tje
subsequent clauses.

There are plethora of reasons behind this trend that why
government
spends
a lot of
money
on
public
celebrations like national holidays and
public
festivals. To
begin
with, there are
some
dates which brings worth place in each and
everyone
's
life
as such dates are
relatedto
our
history
. To
examplify
, 15th
august, 1945
is
very
vaulable
date in our
life
because
on that time, our country
got
freedom thanks to
struggler
as martyrs
Bhagat
Singh,
Rajguru
,
Sukhdev
, they sacrifice their
lives
for country.

Furthermore
, another
important
reason is that it
is best
way to spreading knowledge about
history
and
cuture
along with tradition among new generation celebrating
public
events
like national holidays and
pubic
festivals, they may
get
knowledge about their past happenings which can
help
to them in order to associate with their
history
. Apart from this, they can gain knowledge about how our ancestors
scrificed
their
lives
for independence of our country.
That is
why, high authorities spend lion's share of
money
on
public
ceremonies.
For instance
, republic day,
independence day
and
so
on.

Hence
, having ruminated
aforestation
information, it can
be concluded
that though
public
festivals plays a paramount role in human'life
but
regime ought to invest
some
bucks on another purposes. According to my point of view, another useful purposes
also
play an
important
role in
general public
's
life
.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
20Mistakes

IELTS essay Governments spend a lot of money on public celebrations such as national holidays and public festivals. Some people say that the government spends too much on this and that they should use this money on other useful things. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
293 words
6
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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