Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Governments should spend money on railway rather than roads To what extent do you agree or dissagree with this statement v.2

Governments should spend money on railway rather than roads 2
it is argued that transportation system is more and more facing traffic congestion. Someone believe that governments should allocate money for the construction and upgrade train lines instead of roadways. While I have to admit this perspective is accurate to a somewhat extent. I still hold a notion that both railways and roads need be invested in order to boost socio-economics development. On the one hand, the developed railway systems can bring myriad benefits for inhabitants. this is to say, train line is a treat public transportation as it helps reduce finacial burden in comparison with using private tractors. Moreover, urbanization and demographic trend currently influence on environment so encouraging citizens use train is crucial measures in order to fight climate change. By contracts, railway systems are only suitable for public purposes because train must stop at the station and people might go by other vehicles to get place where they want. On the other hand, road is one of infrastructure elements in social life, if countries wanted to improve their economic and their dwellers living standard, they could develop the road systems as it makes the circulation of goods, passengers or something else much more convenience and smooth. In particularly, though using private tractors make contamination of air, it gives the mobility for people. However, development of roads helps poor residents con access market, education and general value so as to advance their life. Besides, the upgrade of roadways can decline traffic in center cities at rush hour. Last but not least, the road maintenance fee is lower, being easier for authority to manage. To recapitulate, despite the benefits of railways, I strongly convinced that governments ought to develop roadways and railways equally in order to achieve best results.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
it
is argued
that transportation
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
system
is more and more facing traffic congestion. Someone
Consider using third-person verb forms for singular and mass nouns: "believes".
believe
that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
should allocate money for the construction and upgrade
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
lines
instead
of roadways.
“While” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
While
I
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
admit this perspective is accurate to a
You used an adverb ('somewhat') instead of an adjective, or a noun ('extent') instead of another adjective.
somewhat extent
. I
still
hold a notion that both
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
need
be invested
in order to boost
Possible spelling mistake found.
socio-economics
development.

On the one hand, the developed
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
can bring myriad benefits for inhabitants.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
this
is to say,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
line is a treat public transportation as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
Possible spelling mistake found.
finacial
burden
in comparison
with using private tractors.
Moreover
, urbanization and demographic trend
currently
influence on environment
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
encouraging citizens
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
is crucial measures in order to fight climate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. By contracts,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railway
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
suitable for public purposes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
train
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
at the station and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
might go by other vehicles to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
place where they want.

On the other hand
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
is one of infrastructure elements in social life, if countries wanted to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
their economic and their dwellers living standard, they could develop the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
systems
as it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
the circulation of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
, passengers or something else much more convenience and smooth. In
particularly
, though using private tractors
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
contamination of air, it gives the mobility for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.
However
, development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
poor residents con access market, education and general value
'So as to' expresses purpose and is used in formal texts. Consider using "to"
so as to
advance their life.
Besides
, the upgrade of roadways can decline traffic in center cities at rush hour. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
maintenance fee is lower, being easier for authority to manage.

To recapitulate, despite the benefits of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
, I
strongly
convinced that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
ought to develop roadways and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
equally
in order to achieve best results.
10Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
18Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Governments should spend money on railway rather than roads 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
290 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Similar posts


Recent posts