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Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. Discuss both views and give your opinion. v.3

Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. v. 3
It is true that we do not recycle enough of our household waste. Although I accept that new legislation to force people to recycle could help this situation, I do not agree that a recycling law is the only measure that governments should take. In my view, a new recycling law would be just one possible way to tackle the waste problem. Governments could make it a legal obligation for householders to separate all waste into different bins. There could be punishments for people who fail to adhere to this law, ranging from a small fine to community service, or even perhaps prison sentences for repeat offenders. These measures would act as a deterrent and encourage people to obey the recycling law. As a result, the improved behaviour of homeowners could lead to a clean, waste-free environment for everyone. However, I believe that governments should do more than simply introduce a recycling law. It might be more effective if politicians put education, rather than punishment, at the centre of a recycling campaign. For example, children could be taught about recycling in schools, and homeowners could be informed about the environmental impact of household waste. Another tactic that governments could use would be to create stricter regulations for the companies that produce the packaging for household products. Finally, money could also be spent to improve recycling facilities and systems, so that waste is processed more effectively, regardless of whether or not people separate it correctly in the home. In conclusion, perhaps we do need to make recycling a legal requirement, but this would certainly not be the only way to encourage people to dispose of their waste more responsibly.
It is true that we do not recycle
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
of our household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
. Although I accept that new legislation to force
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to recycle could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
this situation, I do not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
is the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
measure that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should take.

In my view, a new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
would be
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
one possible way to tackle the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
problem.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
it a legal obligation for householders to separate all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
bins. There could be punishments for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who fail to adhere to this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
, ranging from a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
fine to community service, or even perhaps prison sentences for repeat offenders. These measures would act as a deterrent and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to obey the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
.
As a result
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
Possible spelling mistake. 'behaviour' is British English.
behaviour
of homeowners could lead to a clean, waste-free environment for everyone.

However
, I believe that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
should do more than
simply
introduce a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
law
. It might be more effective if politicians put education,
rather
than punishment, at the
Possible spelling mistake. 'centre' is British English.
centre
of a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
campaign.
For example
, children could
be taught
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
in schools, and homeowners could
be informed
about the environmental impact of household
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
. Another tactic that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
could
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
would be to create stricter regulations for the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
that produce the packaging for household products.
Finally
, money could
also
be spent
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
facilities and systems,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
is processed
more
effectively
, regardless of
Consider shortening this phrase to just "whether". It is correct though if you mean 'regardless of whether'.
whether or not
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
separate it
correctly
in the home.

In conclusion
, perhaps we do need to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
recycling
a legal requirement,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this would
certainly
not be the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
way to encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to dispose of their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
waste
more
responsibly
.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7Mistakes

IELTS essay Governments give a lot of support to artists, even though some people think it is a waste of money that could have been used elsewhere. v. 3

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
278 words
7
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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