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Government should spend more money on railways rather than roads. To what extent do you agree or disagree with this statement v.4

Government should spend more money on railways rather than roads. with this statement v. 4
It is commonly suggested that rail tracks should receive more of the government's finances rather than roads. I agree with this view, as railways do not cause much damage to our environments and last for longer periods of time. On the one hand, railways are environmental friendly. The tracks are narrow, which reduce the number of trees destroyed to clear ways for its construction and less natural habitats are damaged. For instance, a standard highway in Nigeria can accommodate ten rail tracks. Thus, if the authorities have spent more on train tracks, our ecosystem will not have been adversely affected, but this can corrected with rail tracks. Furthermore, railways are durable. Train tracks are not easily damaged by the forces of nature such as rain and wind, and require only periodic maintenance. For example, the majority of railways in Nigeria were built during the colonial era and are still working effectively. Therefore, unlike roads, they can be used for a longer time. However, some people think that more money should be devoted to roads since a greater number of people utilize road transportation. This may be due to the high number of car owners and traffic congestion in major cities like Beijing and Lagos. They feel that expansions of existing roads and constructions of new ones are needed to address transportation challenges, which require a lot of finances. However, more intra and inter city rail networks will solve this problem. In conclusion, the government should devote more financial resources to railways rather than roads because it does not significantly damage our surroundings and it is more durable. Policy makers should be educated on this view.
It is
commonly
suggested that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
should receive more of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
's finances
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this view, as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
do not cause much damage to our environments and last for longer periods of time.

On the one hand,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are environmental friendly. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
are narrow, which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the number of trees
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
destroyed
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
clear
ways for its construction and less natural habitats
are damaged
.
For instance
, a standard highway in Nigeria can accommodate ten
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
.
Thus
, if the authorities have spent more on train
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
, our ecosystem will not have been
adversely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
this can corrected with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
.

Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
are durable. Train
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tracks
are not
easily
damaged by the forces of nature such as rain and wind, and require
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
periodic maintenance.
For example
, the majority of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
in Nigeria
were built
during the colonial era and are
still
working
effectively
.
Therefore
, unlike
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
, they can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for a longer time.

However
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that more money should
be devoted
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
since a greater number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
utilize
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
road
transportation. This may be due to the high number of car owners and traffic congestion in major cities like Beijing and Lagos. They feel that expansions of existing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
and constructions of new ones
are needed
to address transportation challenges, which require
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
finances.
However
, more
Possible spelling mistake found.
intra
and inter city
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rail
networks will solve this problem.

In conclusion
, the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should devote more financial resources to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
rather
than
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
roads
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it does not
significantly
damage our surroundings and it is more durable.
This expression is normally spelled as one or with hyphen.
Policy makers
should
be educated
on this view.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes
Language shapes the way we think, and determines what we can think about.
Benjamin Lee Whorf

IELTS essay Government should spend more money on railways rather than roads. with this statement v. 4

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
275 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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