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Government should spend more money on medical research to protect citizens’ health rather than on protecting the environment. Do you agree or disagree?

Government should spend more money on medical research to protect citizens’ health rather than on protecting the environment. yobP
Government plays a crucial role in the management of our society. It has been reasoned that the state should invest heavily in the healthcare sector rather than the environmental sector. This essay will explore this topic and present a firm opinion. To begin, environmental protection has become an extremely contentious topic. Although it is obvious that humans are capable of damaging the natural world, the extent to which this takes place and the lasting effect are very much contested. Governments should spend money on indirect methods of environmental protectionism such as educating the public and offering various incentives to those who strive to keep both artificial and natural spaces clean. Firstly, it is relatively inexpensive for political leaders to produce public service announcements on social media outlets such as Youtube, Facebook, and Twitter. Secondly, cash rebates, grocery store vouchers, and tax deductions can be utilized in order to persuade citizens to be “greener”. Next, a similar case to the above could be made for the healthcare sector. People often do not feel comfortable with the government being involved with personal matters of health and wellness. The extent to which the government is involved in needs not go further than increasing public health awareness and promoting healthy living. Politicians are neither business nor health professionals. Therefore, the research and development of health care products and services should be left to passionate entrepreneurs, medical practitioners, and scientific professionals. Recently, the world has witnessed a global pandemic, and several private sector companies and manufacturers have successfully produced millions of masks and thousands of life-saving ventilators. Although the government has helped to manage distribution, it has heavily relied on privately owned companies. In conclusion, governments do serve a vital role to the management and maintenance of society; however, their duties need not go as far as to affect the lives of citizens in an overtly personal way. Governments should instead shift their focus on environmental matters. Perhaps in the future, the state will occupy a more limited role and allow the private sector to do what it does best.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Government
plays a crucial role in the management of our society. It has
been reasoned
that the state should invest
heavily
in the healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
rather
than the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
. This essay will explore this topic and present a firm opinion.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
protection has become an
extremely
contentious topic. Although it is obvious that humans are capable of damaging the natural world, the extent to which this takes place and the lasting effect are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
much contested.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
should spend money on indirect methods of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
protectionism such as educating the public and offering various incentives to those who strive to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
both artificial and natural spaces clean.
Firstly
, it is
relatively
inexpensive for political leaders to produce public service announcements on social media outlets such as
Possible spelling mistake found.
Youtube
, Facebook, and Twitter.
Secondly
, cash rebates, grocery store vouchers, and tax deductions can
be utilized
in order to persuade citizens to be “greener”.

Next
, a similar case to the above could
be made
for the healthcare
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
People
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
do not feel comfortable with the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
being involved
with personal matters of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
and wellness. The extent to which the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is involved
in needs not go
further
than increasing public
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
awareness and promoting healthy living. Politicians are neither business nor
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
professionals.
Therefore
, the research and development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care products and services should be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
left
to passionate entrepreneurs, medical practitioners, and scientific professionals. Recently, the world has witnessed a global pandemic, and several private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
and manufacturers have
successfully
produced millions of masks and thousands of life-saving ventilators. Although the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helped
to manage distribution, it has
heavily
relied on
privately
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
owned
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
do serve a vital role to the management and maintenance of society;
however
, their duties need not go as far as to affect the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
of citizens in an
overtly
personal way.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Governments
should
instead
shift their focus on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
matters. Perhaps in the future, the state will occupy a more limited role and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
allow
the private
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sector
to do what it does best.

IELTS essay Government should spend more money on medical research to protect citizens’ health rather than on protecting the environment.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
345 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
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