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Government should spend money on railways rather than roads

Government should spend money on railways rather than roads Qg31
Transportation has been one of the biggest revolution in human life, connecting the world through different modes. The governments have invested lots of time and money in providing quality means of transportation. Among the different modes of transportation, I personally agree that more money can be spent on railways rather than roadways. Firstly, it is conspicuous that a larger number of people can commute through trains rather than cars or busses. Railways can also help in logistics, where large goods can be transported to various places quickly as well as efficiently. Further, the travel expense could also be reduced to a greater extent by using government train services. Secondly, considering the importance of human life, it is apparent that the fatality rate is higher in road transportation on comparison with railways. The rate of accidents occurring on road is going up every day and it will be wise choice to consider moving towards other modes of travel. Adding to this, pollution can be the most dangerous problem in the near future and automobiles are the predominant source of these emissions. Moving to more eco-friendly vehicles can be a much required decision. In conclusion, I can say that the government should also concentrate on roads and plan a good design to reduce the accidents occurring, but more money should be spent on development of railways and making it an eco-friendly entity.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Transportation
has been one of the biggest revolution in human life, connecting the world through
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
modes. The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
have invested lots of time and money in providing quality means of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
. Among the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
modes of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
, I
personally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
that more money can
be spent
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
rather
than roadways.

Firstly
, it is conspicuous that a larger number of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
can commute through trains
rather
than cars or busses.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Railways
can
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in logistics, where large
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
goods
can
be transported
to various places
quickly
as well
as
efficiently
.
Further
, the travel expense could
also
be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduced
to a greater extent by using
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
train services.

Secondly
, considering the importance of human life, it is apparent that the fatality rate is higher in road
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
transportation
on comparison with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
. The rate of accidents occurring on road is going up every day and it will be wise choice to consider moving towards other modes of travel. Adding to this, pollution can be the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
dangerous
problem in the near future and automobiles are the predominant source of these emissions. Moving to more eco-friendly vehicles can be a much required decision.

In conclusion
, I can say that the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should
also
concentrate on roads and plan a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
design to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
the accidents occurring,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
more money should
be spent
on development of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
railways
and making it an eco-friendly entity.
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IELTS essay Government should spend money on railways rather than roads

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
230 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 6.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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