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Government should make laws about people’s nutrition and food choice. Other argue that is their choice. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Government should make laws about people’s nutrition and food choice. Other argue that is their choice. EldxR
Nowdays people are very foodie. some people have crazy about taste the new items of food such as pizza, burger, noodles and so on. However others individuals very conscious about their health. I would confabulate the diverse views and my opinion. The first and the foremost one, there are lots of people like to try new junk food like italian food pasta, chinese food noodles and so on. But which is very effective on health on human body. Firstly, there are lots of people has being obese and overweight. Whenever, when people have overweight they facing lots of disease effected on human body. For example, authority could increase the tax on those food, which are unhygienic, like pizza and burger. Government should take some steps which is provide good life styles to people. Secondly, they should be know which is healthy food or which is unhealthy for us. There are some previous views, others individuals consider that, it is a matter of personal responsibility. If people want healthy life in future then they should be control on lifestyle which is very mandatory for everyone. Moreover, if people are stoping eating junk food, then they would be healthy lifestyle and would be fine also. They are toatally responsible for own self. There are plethora of nutritions plan, they can easily follow and knowledge about health eating habits. In the campenidum, i pen down saying that, I believe that, it is not only responsibility of individual but also government should take some effective steps to promote citizen towards the healthy lifestyle by making rules and regulations.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Nowdays
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
foodie.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have crazy about taste the new items of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
such as pizza, burger, noodles and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
others individuals
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
conscious about their health. I would confabulate the diverse views and my opinion.

The
first
and the foremost one, there are lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
like to try new junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
like
Possible spelling mistake found.
italian
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
pasta,
Possible spelling mistake found.
chinese
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
noodles and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
on.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
But
which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
effective on health on human body.
Firstly
, there are lots of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
has being obese and overweight. Whenever, when
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have
Possible agreement error – use past participle here: "overweighted".
overweight
Did you mean "they're facing", "they are facing", or "they were facing"?
they facing
lots of disease effected on human body.
For example
, authority could increase the tax on those
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, which are unhygienic, like pizza and burger.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Government
should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
steps which is
Consider using a past participle here: "provided".
provide
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
life styles to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
Secondly
, they should be
Did you mean "known"?
know
which is
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
or which is unhealthy for us.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
previous views, others individuals consider that, it is a matter of personal responsibility. If
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
want
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
life in future then they should be control on lifestyle which is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
mandatory for everyone.
Moreover
, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are
Possible spelling mistake found.
stoping
eating junk
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
food
, then they would be
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
lifestyle and would be fine
also
. They are
Possible spelling mistake found.
toatally
responsible for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
self. There are plethora of
Possible spelling mistake found.
nutritions
plan, they can
easily
follow and knowledge about health eating habits.

In the
Possible spelling mistake found.
campenidum
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
pen down saying that, I believe that, it is not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
responsibility of individual
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
should take
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
effective steps to promote citizen towards the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
healthy
lifestyle by making
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
and regulations.
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IELTS essay Government should make laws about people’s nutrition and food choice. Other argue that is their choice.

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
264 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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