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from vietnam social prejudices to glass ceiling

from vietnam social prejudices to glass ceiling 1bNNG
Looking at Vietnam, there are still countless social prejudices that apply to women, becoming invisible barriers that are present whether they are at home or at work. In the family, influenced by Eastern culture, stereotypes about the role of women make the wife often not have a decisive voice in the family. A survey also shows that, when talking about obstacles in career, the reason that many women mention is that men do not adequately share the responsibilities of housework and childcare with them. . At work, the invisible barrier is the notion that men are stronger, more assertive, that women do not have the ability to lead like men. According to Valentina Barcucci (ILO Vietnam), gender stereotypes in the minds of managers can be a barrier for women to advance into leadership positions. This contributes to the formation of rigor in the assessment, appointment and promotion of women. In addition, another common stereotype - the motherhood stereotype - makes people often picture women who are or plan to have children with limited work capacity and commitment to work.
Looking at Vietnam, there are
still
countless social prejudices that apply to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
, becoming invisible barriers that are present whether they are at home or at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
. In the family, influenced by Eastern culture,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stereotypes
about the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
Possible agreement error. Did you mean "makes"? (Some collective nouns can be treated as both singular and plural, so 'make' is not always incorrect.)
make
the wife
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
not have a decisive voice in the family. A survey
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that, when talking about obstacles in career, the reason that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
mention is that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
do not
adequately
share the responsibilities of housework and childcare with them.
Don't put a space before the full stop
.
At
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, the invisible barrier is the notion that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
are stronger, more assertive, that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
do not have the ability to lead like
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
men
. According to Valentina
Possible spelling mistake found.
Barcucci
(
Possible spelling mistake found.
ILO
Vietnam), gender
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stereotypes
in the minds of managers can be a barrier for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
to advance into leadership positions. This contributes to the formation of rigor in the assessment, appointment and promotion of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
.
In addition
, another common
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stereotype
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
the motherhood
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
stereotype
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
-
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
makes
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
picture
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
women
who are or plan to have children with limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
capacity and commitment to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
.
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IELTS essay from vietnam social prejudices to glass ceiling

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
179 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
5.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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