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frog's population is decreasing and it results in problems for humans

The modern era is the most fast-paced time from the dawn of civilization. New methods for communication and transporting data like the internet, smartphones, and social media changed our world forever in a revolutionary way. Everything is at a maximum speed and alters as fast as possible. Take into consideration these changes numerous people believe it is critical for young people to have discipline and order in their daily life rather than our ancestors. On the contrary, others believe we should live similar to the past and live the moment. As far as I'm concerned, in the current century with a hectic lifestyle in which technology, problems, and what's more the solution for the problems is changing every minute, we should have a bright plan and restrict organization to reach our goals in life for some reasons, among which the updating our ability without delay, conquering lots of distractions, and overcoming new issues that have never been before are of more impotance. First, contemporary life has its complexity. In the past, people used a hammer or a shovel as their tool for work for many years; Conversely, nowadays, every year or even every month, novel devices obsolete old ones. Consequently, the novel ones have unique instructions, and we should develop that knowledge in us. If we do not have an organized life we get behind, and we may lose our job. Furthermore, it affects our daily life. For instance, in our city bills should be paid on the internet. If anyone can not use the internet, they should pay more to someone else to do it for them. Second, we are surrounded by a lot of distractions. A plethora of these distractions is addictive too. For instance, social media like Instagram and Twitter have a tremendous amount of beautiful pictures and texts. If we use these apps extremely they take all of our time. For instance, last year, while I wanted to study for the Toefl exam, I have been spending a huge time on Twitter to notify arguments that were about the United States election. I found out it took lots of time for me, so I created a plan to use my phone for only 30 minutes a day; besides, I decided to leave my phone out of the bedroom. Finally, several problems exclusively belong to our era. To be more specific, in the 100 years ago there was no traffic or lots of business travel for ordinary people. For example, I spend about 2 hours a day in traffic every day to commute from my home to the office. I lose many hours in a day inadvertently. There is no room to waste more time; accordingly, I should have a perfect organization to handle all aspects of my life. In conclusion, In my view, whereas our life in the current era is at a fast speed and changes so fast, moreover, we have new time-consuming activities and problems, we should manage our time perfectly to achieve our goal. That's correct that living based on a schedule requires tremendous effort; however, being a loser is harder.
The modern era is the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
-paced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
from the dawn of civilization. New methods for communication and transporting data like the internet, smartphones, and social media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changed
our world forever in a revolutionary way. Everything is at a maximum speed and alters as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
as possible. Take into consideration these
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
numerous
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
believe it is critical for young
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
to have discipline and order in their daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
rather
than our ancestors.
On the contrary
, others believe we should
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
similar to the past and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
the moment. As far as I'm concerned, in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
century with a hectic lifestyle in which technology,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, and what's more the solution for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
is changing every minute, we should have a bright plan and restrict organization to reach our goals in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
reasons, among which the updating our ability without delay, conquering
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of distractions, and overcoming new issues that have never been
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
are of more
Possible spelling mistake found.
impotance
.

First
, contemporary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
has its complexity. In the past,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
a hammer or a shovel as their tool for work for
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
years;
Conversely
, nowadays, every
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
or even every month, novel devices obsolete
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
old
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
.
Consequently
, the novel
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
ones
have unique instructions, and we should develop that knowledge in us. If we do not have an organized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
behind, and we may lose our job.
Furthermore
, it affects our daily
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
.
For instance
, in our city bills should
be paid
on the internet. If anyone can not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the internet, they should pay more to someone else to do it for them.

Second, we
are surrounded
by a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lot
of distractions. A plethora of these distractions is addictive too.
For instance
, social media like Instagram and Twitter have a tremendous amount of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
pictures and texts.
“If” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
If
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
these apps
extremely
they take all of our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
.
For instance
, last
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
year
, while I wanted to study for the
Possible spelling mistake found.
Toefl
exam, I have been spending a huge
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
on Twitter to notify arguments that were about the United States election. I found out it took
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for me,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
I created a plan to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
my phone for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
30 minutes a day;
besides
, I decided to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
leave
my phone out of the bedroom.

Finally
, several
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
exclusively belong to our era. To be more specific, in the 100 years ago there was no traffic or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lots
of business travel for ordinary
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
.
For example
, I spend about 2 hours a day in traffic every day to commute from my home to the office. I lose
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
hours in a day
inadvertently
. There is no room to waste more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
;
accordingly
, I should have a perfect organization to handle all aspects of my life.

In conclusion
, In my view, whereas our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
life
in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
current
era is at a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
speed and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
,
moreover
, we have new time-consuming activities and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
problems
, we should manage our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
perfectly
to achieve our goal. That's correct that living based on a schedule requires tremendous effort;
however
, being a loser is harder.
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IELTS essay frog's population is decreasing and it results in problems for humans

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
518 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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