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Forests are the lungs of the earth. Destruction of the world's forests amounts to death of the world we currently know. To what extent do you agree or disagree? v.7

Forests are the lungs of the earth. Destruction of the world's forests amounts to death of the world we currently know. v. 7
From the start of human civilization, the world population is raising tremendously while the size of the forest is dropping to a great extend. Someone believes that it is the biggest stride on earth as well as human prosperity. However, I would contend that it also evidences that we are the main culprits to the death of the world. To begin with the supportive argument, the space freed from deforestation is the essential land resource provider for us to continue develop our city, making the world more suitable to human beings. Indeed, our human civilization starting from living inside the cave to living in the house or the high rise building is heavily dependent on the land. Without removal of forest, the space is insufficient to us to build the metropolises currently we have now. In this sense, deforestation actually gains us momentum on making the prosperity of the world. Conversely making the world stride, the deforestation will eventually result to the world no longer inhabitable for human brings as long as all living things. The problem behind the removal of tree is that it will aggravate the problem of global warming. Scientifically, one of the well-known reasons of global warning is the release of carbon dioxide from different factories. Trees indeed alleviate this situation by transforming the carbon dioxide into oxygen so that our temperature will not raise exponentially. However, if we keep destroying the forest, it is believable that our temperature will rise to such a level that not only all humans can find nowhere to live, but also no animals can find a place to inhabit. There is indisputable evidence that the temperature of the earth is increasing year by year since the start of human civilization. Thus, the reason of deforestation making the world prosperity is unpersuasive. All in all, the deforestation, instead of making stride on earth, is actually destroying the earth. I would urge all the governments and all the enterprises to stop killing the tree and take all necessary measures to protect the world' s forests.
From the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
civilization, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
population is raising
tremendously
while the size of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
is dropping to a great
Did you mean the noun "extent"?
extend
. Someone believes that it is the biggest stride on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
as well
as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
prosperity.
However
, I would contend that it
also
evidences that we are the main culprits to the death of the world.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with the supportive argument, the space freed from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
is the essential land resource provider for us to
Probably a preposition is missing after 'continue'.
continue develop
our city, making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
more suitable to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
beings.
Indeed
, our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
civilization starting from living inside the cave to living in the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
house
or the high rise building is
heavily
dependent on the land. Without removal of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
, the space is insufficient to us to build the metropolises
currently
we have
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
. In this sense,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
actually gains us momentum on making the prosperity of the world.

Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
Conversely
making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
stride, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
will
eventually
result to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
no longer inhabitable for
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
brings as long as all living things. The problem behind the removal of tree is that it will aggravate the problem of global warming.
Scientifically
, one of the well-known reasons of global warning is the release of carbon dioxide from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
factories. Trees
indeed
alleviate this situation by transforming the carbon dioxide into oxygen
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
that our temperature will not raise
exponentially
.
However
, if we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
keep
destroying the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forest
, it is believable that our temperature will rise to such a level that not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
humans
can find nowhere to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
no animals can find a place to inhabit. There is indisputable evidence that the temperature of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
is increasing year by year since the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
start
of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
human
civilization.
Thus
, the reason of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
making the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
prosperity is unpersuasive.

All in all, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
deforestation
,
instead
of making stride on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
, is actually destroying the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
earth
. I would urge all the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
governments
and all the enterprises to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
killing the tree and take all necessary measures to protect the
Possible spelling mistake found.
world&
#039; s
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
forests
.
13Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
4Mistakes
A special kind of beauty exists which is born in language, of language, and for language.
Gaston Bachelard

IELTS essay Forests are the lungs of the earth. Destruction of the world's forests amounts to death of the world we currently know. v. 7

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
343 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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