Do you want to improve your writing? Try our new evaluation service and get detailed feedback.
Check Your Text it's free

Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

It is hard to say that historical attractions are national symbols, and such a fact leads to impressionable people to generate the idea that foreign visitors should pay the same as the local visitors as they are entitled to enjoy the sites of the mankind. However this statement suffers from both factual and logical fallacies, and it should be examined meticulously. As far as the culture, economy, and feasibility are concerned, I strongly held that foreigners should spend more for these attractions. First and foremost, it is pivotal to boost the national pride in the traditional culture, as we are in a time where all kinds of culture intrude our lives, forming our judgement of value and awareness. To be more specific, we are familiar with the most popular rock stars in the United States, while we can hardly remember the history underlining the sites located so close to us, resulting in a lack of confidence in our own culture. Additionally, according to the 2019 National Bureau Statistics, that the main reason discouraging local visitors to the local cultural and historical attractions is the high price of the admission ticket to these sites. Cultural and historical sites have their role in shaping citizens’ identity to their culture. With a free or low-cost ticket, local visitors would avail themselves with more opportunities to touch their own culture. Furthermore, the fact that local government could receive more money from the foreigners indicates that we would invest more in the local infrastructure such as the road, facilities, schools, etc. Take the case of Airbnb, which adopts a differentiated pricing strategy in the global market. In the developed countries, hotels rent each day are much more expensive than the developing countries, as the living standard differs from different places. They take advantage of the money, to upgrade its service and invest in innovation. As a result, Airbnb now became a most advanced company in the new era. Had it not been for let the rich pay more, the local infrastructure cannot be improved. Nevertheless, a voice arises that cultural and historical sites are the grace of the mankind, and we should treat the visiting equally, as the high price discourages the foreign visitors to visit. Ironically, the ticket for the attractions only accounts for a small portion of their travelling budget. In that case, the relative “high” price is acceptable for the foreigner. With a less crowded sites, the local people are more willing to enjoy the sightseeing. Therefore, it is feasible to adopt a discriminatory price for the cultural and historical sites. In a nutshell, I maintain that it is necessary to make the foreigners pay more. Admittedly, as my favorite quote from James Madison goes, as long as the reason of man continues fallible, different opinions will be formed, and some people may oppose me. However, I believe they will compromise after being exposed to my advice.
It is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
to say that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
attractions are national symbols, and such a fact leads to impressionable
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to generate the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
idea
that foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
should pay the same as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
as they
are entitled
to enjoy the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
of the mankind.
Did you forget a comma after a conjunctive/linking adverb?
However
this statement suffers from both factual and logical fallacies, and it should
be examined
meticulously
. As far as the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, economy, and feasibility
are concerned
, I
strongly
held that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
should spend more for these attractions.

First
and foremost, it is pivotal to boost the national pride in the traditional
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
, as we are in a
It is better to use ‘time’ with the time-relative pronoun ‘when’: “time when”. (Alternatively, use ‘in/on which’)
time where
all kinds of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
intrude our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, forming our judgement of value and awareness. To be more specific, we are familiar with the most popular rock stars in the United States, while we can hardly remember the history underlining the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
located
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
close to us, resulting in a lack of confidence in our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
.
Additionally
, according to the 2019 National Bureau Statistics, that the main reason discouraging
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
attractions is the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
of the admission ticket to these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
have their role in shaping citizens’ identity to their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
. With a free or low-cost ticket,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
would avail themselves with more opportunities to touch their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
culture.

Furthermore
, the fact that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
government
could receive more money from the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
indicates that we would invest more in the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
infrastructure such as the road, facilities, schools, etc. Take the case of Airbnb, which adopts a differentiated pricing strategy in the global market. In the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developed countries
, hotels rent each day are much more expensive than the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
, as the living standard differs from
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
places. They take advantage of the money, to upgrade its service and invest in innovation.
As a result
, Airbnb
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
became a most advanced
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
company
in the new era. Had it not been for
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
the rich pay more, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
infrastructure cannot be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improved
.

Nevertheless
, a voice arises that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
are the grace of the mankind, and we should treat the visiting
equally
, as the high
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
discourages the foreign
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
visitors
to visit.
Ironically
, the ticket for the attractions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
accounts for a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
small
portion of their travelling budget.
In that case
, the relative “high”
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
is acceptable for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigner
. With a less crowded
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
sites
, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
local
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are more willing to enjoy the sightseeing.
Therefore
, it is feasible to adopt a discriminatory
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
price
for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultural
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
historical
sites.

In a nutshell, I maintain that it is necessary to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
foreigners
pay more.
Admittedly
, as my favorite quote from James Madison goes, as long as the reason of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
man
continues fallible,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
opinions will
be formed
, and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
may oppose me.
However
, I believe they will compromise after
being exposed
to my advice.
What do you think?
  • This is funny writingFunny
  • I love this writingLove
  • This writing has blown my mindWow
  • It made me angryAngry
  • It made me sadSad

IELTS essay Foreign visitors should pay more than local visitors for cultural and historical attractions.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
485 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
Recent posts