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For centuries, important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing and Math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skills be made as fourth skill to the list. To what extent do you agree? v.2

For centuries, important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing and Math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skills be made as fourth skill to the list. v. 2
Skills needed by the employers keep on changing. Hence, education system needs to evolve. Reading, writing and maths has been the most important pillars and with the advent of computers, there have been arguments to make this the fourth pillar. I agree with this view. However, this could have some negative effects on the children. Computers can impact the cognitive abilities of the children. It offers a great range of applications in the fields of reading, writing, calculations etc. The use of such applications at an early age can prevent kids from attaining the basic knowledge of communication and calculation. For example, instead of learning tables and performing calculations with their minds, they rely on the calculator application. Similarly, with the applications such as spell checker etc. , kids refrain from learning the correct words and grammar. On the contrary, it has become very important to gain computer skills these days. IT sector has become a big sector in the whole world, which generates millions of jobs every year. Thus, there are better job opportunities for people with the professional computer courses. Furthermore, most of the government institutions and companies rely on the computers for their work. For instance, in India, you can apply for passport online and get an appointment. Even the employees use computers to scan the documents, fill the applicant related data, print the reciept etc. Therefore, this is a must have skill irrespective of the work sector. To conclude, even though computers may hamper the cogniyive abilities of a child, there is no doubt that it has become must for us to include this skill in the education system. This will enable kids to get jobs.
Skills
needed by the employers
keep
on changing.
Hence
, education system needs to evolve. Reading, writing and
maths
has been the most
important
pillars and with the advent of computers, there have been arguments to
make
this the fourth pillar. I
agree
with this view.
However
, this could have
some
negative
effects on the children.

Computers can impact the cognitive abilities of the children. It offers a great range of
applications
in the fields of reading, writing, calculations etc. The
use
of such
applications
at an early age can
prevent
kids from attaining the basic knowledge of communication and calculation.
For example
,
instead
of learning tables and performing calculations with their minds, they rely on the calculator
application
.
Similarly
, with the
applications
such as spell checker etc.
,
kids refrain from learning the correct words and grammar.

On the contrary
, it has become
very
important
to gain computer
skills
these days. IT sector has become a
big
sector in the whole world, which generates millions of jobs every year.
Thus
, there are better job opportunities for
people
with the professional computer courses.
Furthermore
, most of the
government
institutions and
companies
rely on the computers for their work.
For instance
, in India, you can apply for passport online and
get
an appointment. Even the employees
use
computers to scan the documents, fill the applicant related data, print the
reciept
etc.
Therefore
, this is a
must have
skill
irrespective of the work sector.

To conclude
,
even though
computers may hamper the
cogniyive
abilities of a child, there is no doubt that it has become
must
for us to include this
skill
in the education system. This will enable kids to
get
jobs.
14Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
5Mistakes

IELTS essay For centuries, important parts of education have remained such as reading, writing and Math. With the advent of computers, some people think that computer skills be made as fourth skill to the list. v. 2

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
280 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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