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Food can be produced more cheaply today because of improved fertilisers and better machinery. However, some people argue that such development may be dangerous to human health and may have negative effects on local communities. Do you agree or disagree? v.2

Food can be produced more cheaply today because of improved fertilisers and better machinery. However, some people argue that such development may be dangerous to human health and may have negative effects on local communities. v. 2
Nowadays, the cultivation period of food is decreased due to the application of the latest technology such as mechanization in the agriculture industry and high efficient fertilizers. In my opinion, these methods might have severe disadvantages. There are two main reasons why such foods might impact people health and present economy. First, the safety of these foods cannot be guaranteed, because some underlying foods toxicity might be discovered through long-run research. For example, the carcinogenic risk of some specific substance, which has been used to produce food for many decades, are pointed out through the latest research. These components with healthy-risk might have caused many cancer cases. Thus, the potential risks and dangers of some synthetic fertilisers should be confronted. In addition, agriculture mechanization exists a great many threats to society, especially the fewer job opportunities offering. Compared with labours, machines operation is more efficient. Obviously, such a structure unemployed people might become a serious social issue, who cannot be re-employed easily due to lack of work skills to fulfil the requirements of other jobs. In spite of this, the obvious benefit of cheaper food production is that they can satisfy requests from the lower-income group or someone suffering from famine. As a result, the living standard of some poor can be fulfilled, and the paid gap might bridge by cheaper food. In conclusion, these foods might contribute to ease the hunger problem, while improving the living standard of the Poor. Unfortunately, they are undeniable and noteworthy that underlying health risks and structure unemployment due to fertilizers using and mechanization respectively, because they might threat our daily life.
Nowadays, the cultivation period of
food
is decreased
due to the application of the latest technology such as mechanization in the agriculture industry and high efficient fertilizers. In my opinion, these methods
might
have severe disadvantages.

There are two main reasons why such
foods
might
impact
people
health and present economy.
First
, the safety of these
foods
cannot
be guaranteed
,
because
some
underlying
foods
toxicity
might
be discovered
through long-run research.
For example
, the carcinogenic
risk
of
some
specific substance, which has been
used
to produce
food
for
many
decades,
are pointed
out through the latest research. These components with healthy-
risk
might
have caused
many
cancer cases.
Thus
, the potential
risks
and
dangers
of
some
synthetic
fertilisers
should
be confronted
.

In addition
, agriculture mechanization exists a great
many
threats to society,
especially
the fewer job opportunities offering. Compared with
labours
, machines operation is more efficient.
Obviously
, such a structure unemployed
people
might
become a serious social issue, who cannot be re-employed
easily
due to lack of work
skills
to fulfil the requirements of other jobs.

In spite of
this, the obvious benefit of cheaper
food
production is that they can satisfy requests from the lower-income group or someone suffering from famine.
As a result
, the living standard of
some
poor can
be fulfilled
, and the paid gap
might
bridge by cheaper food.

In conclusion
, these
foods
might
contribute to
ease
the hunger problem, while improving the living standard of the Poor. Unfortunately, they are undeniable and noteworthy that underlying health
risks
and structure unemployment due to fertilizers using and mechanization
respectively
,
because
they
might
threat our daily life.
7Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
15Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
3Mistakes

IELTS essay Food can be produced more cheaply today because of improved fertilisers and better machinery. However, some people argue that such development may be dangerous to human health and may have negative effects on local communities. v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
268 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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