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Firm Disciplines in Teaching Kids. Agree or Disagree ?

Firm Disciplines in Teaching Kids. Agree or Disagree? d3wG6
Whether firm discipline should be applied in educating children is a matter of controversy. Some people reckon that this issue has positive effects on children’s psychology while others advocate that it can exert negative impacts on children’s relationships. I partly agree with this issue for the following reasons. On the one hand, I am of the belief that firm discipline has positive influences on children’s education, which supplies them with a chance to form good behaviors in children. Social statistics have shown that only thanks to the firm discipline, have children known to respect adults and obey the rules of the community, social. Moreover, there is no denying that firm discipline assist teacher to easily manage the class. Last but not least, it is undoubted that this issue also has great impacts on children’s psychology, which creates children a favorable condition to realize their mistakes and never make them again. My cousin is a case in point. One time, he was lazy to study and copy in tests. He was caught and suspended from school for a day. By virtue of these disciplines, he has become hard-working and never made that mistake again. However, on the other hand, it goes without saying that firm discipline also has disadvantages. Firstly, this issue has unwanted consequences on children’s psychology, which can be an obsession with psychological trauma. Medical studies have shown that children who suffer from firm discipline tend to be more stubborn and lack confidence. In addition, it can not be denied that this problem can worsen relationships between parents and children or between teachers and students. According to state law, firm discipline may violate children’s rights and will be punished depending on the level of violation.
“Whether” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
Whether
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
should
be applied
in educating
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
is a matter of controversy.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
reckon that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
effects on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
psychology while others advocate that it can exert
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
impacts on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
relationships. I partly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
for the following reasons.

On the one hand, I am of the belief that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
influences on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
education, which supplies them with a
Did you mean "change"?
chance
to form
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
behaviors in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. Social statistics have shown that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
thanks to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
, have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
known to respect adults and obey the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
rules
of the community, social.
Moreover
, there is no denying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
assist teacher to
easily
manage the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
class
. Last
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
not least, it
is undoubted
that this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
also
has great impacts on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
psychology, which creates
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
a favorable condition to realize their mistakes and never
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
them again. My cousin is a case in point. One time, he was lazy to study and copy in
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
tests
. He
was caught
and suspended from school for a day. By virtue of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
disciplines
, he has become
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
hard
-working and never made that mistake again.

However
,
on the other hand
, it goes without saying that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
also
has disadvantages.
Firstly
, this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issue
has unwanted consequences on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
psychology, which can be an obsession with psychological trauma. Medical studies have shown that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
who suffer from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
tend to be more stubborn and lack confidence.
In addition
, it can not
be denied
that this problem can worsen relationships between parents and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
or between teachers and students. According to state law,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
firm
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
discipline
may violate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
rights and will
be punished
depending on the level of violation.
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IELTS essay Firm Disciplines in Teaching Kids. Agree or Disagree?

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
286 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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