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Fashion is harmful ?. Discuss

Fashion is harmful ?. Discuss lqOYQ
Nowadays, the fashion industry is growing and making great progress every day and has remarkable successes. That proves that fashion plays an important role in human life. However, fashion also has many alarming consequences. One of the biggest limitations of fashion to our society is its constant change. We are all aware that it is constantly changing. New year comes new trends that if we don't adopt, we are sure to be scrutinized by the fashion police in our neighborhood or school. For many rapid changes in fashion, it encourages people to buy clothes or other things unnecessarily. That means splurging on things that won't last long. Theft, robbery, extortion are popular youth ways that are becoming fashionable. They are so attracted and addicted to fashion that they are willing to do anything to get the look they want. Teenagers have become so rebellious that they even wear hideous-looking things. Environment and upbringing also have a lot to do with how an individual is influenced by the fashions around him. Teenagers in the countryside will dress completely differently from teenagers in the city. Today, young people are increasingly focusing on fashion rather than focusing on careers. They want to know everything about fashion, but know little about their school or college activities. This is one of the major negative effects of fashion on students. Fashion will not harm society if we learn to strike a balance between our studies and our hobbies. Everyone wants to look good, there's no harm in it, unless you're completely obsessed with it. In conclusion, fashion doesn't hurt, but don't let it get in the way of your lifestyle and career.
Nowadays, the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
industry is growing and making great progress every day and has remarkable successes. That proves that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
plays an
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
role in human life.
However
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
also
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
alarming consequences.

One of the biggest limitations of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
to our society is its constant
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
. We are all aware that it is
constantly
changing. New year
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
new trends that if we don't adopt, we are sure to
be scrutinized
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
police in our neighborhood or school. For
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
rapid
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
changes
in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
, it encourages
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
clothes or other things
unnecessarily
. That means splurging on things that won't last long.

Theft, robbery, extortion are popular youth ways that are becoming fashionable. They are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
attracted and addicted to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
that they are willing to do anything to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
the look they want.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Teenagers
have become
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
rebellious that they even wear hideous-looking things.

Environment and upbringing
also
have a lot to do with how an individual
is influenced
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashions
around him.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Teenagers
in the countryside will dress completely
differently
from
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
teenagers
in the city.
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
Today
, young
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are
increasingly
focusing on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
rather
than focusing on careers. They want to know everything about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
know
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
about their school or college activities. This is one of the major
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
on students.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Fashion
will not harm society if we learn to strike a balance between our studies and our hobbies. Everyone wants to look
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
, there's no harm in it, unless you're completely obsessed with it.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
fashion
doesn't hurt,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
don't
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
let
it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
in the way of your lifestyle and career.
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IELTS essay Fashion is harmful ?. Discuss

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
276 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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