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expressing your GIVE YOUR OWN opinion about money: “You only stop worrying about money when you have a lot of it”.

expressing your GIVE YOUR OWN opinion about money: “You only stop worrying about money when you have a lot of it”. NmlOb
Many people say: ” You only stop worrying about money when you have a lot of it. ” It’s a very wrong opinion that I am not agree with. First, the more money you have, the more complicated money management becomes. Then your money concern is also greater. Secondly you will have many relationships related to money, which really give you a headache about it. Third, money can make you lose trust in others. When you have a lot of money you don't worry about price. you can buy everything you want. Second, money helps you do what you want. That's a very comfortable feeling. So in my opinion, money is an impossible part of life, but it is not all. Money motivates us to work, gives us many things but also takes us many things.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
say:
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
”
You
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
worrying about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
when you have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
it. ” It’s a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
opinion that I am not
Consider using a past participle here: "agreed".
agree
with.
First
, the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
you have, the more complicated
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
management becomes. Then your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
concern is
also
greater.
Secondly
you will have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
relationships related to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
, which
really
give you a headache about it. Third,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
you lose trust in others.
“When” at the beginning of a sentence usually requires a 2nd clause. Maybe a comma, question or exclamation mark is missing, or the sentence is incomplete and should be joined with the following sentence.
When
you have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
you don't worry about price.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
you
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
buy
everything you want. Second,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
you do what you want. That's a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
comfortable feeling.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
in my opinion,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
money
is an impossible part of life,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
it is not all.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Money
motivates us to work, gives us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
takes us
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
things.

IELTS essay expressing your GIVE YOUR OWN opinion about money: “You only stop worrying about money when you have a lot of it”.

Essay
  American English
1 paragraphs
136 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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