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Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. To what extent do you agree or disagree. v.16

Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. v. 16
It is often thought that every nation should offer the latest medical facilities to its citizens, irrespective of expenses and availability. I completely agree with this notion, not only because it is the fundamental right and taxes paying by people, but also because of deaths due to unaffordability. This essay will explore how these factors justify my opinion. Firstly, the factor that compelled me to agree with this statement is people pay taxes to the state. The government has fixed a specific percentage on everything which they claim to spend for the betterment of the citizens, and that has to be paid by its. Take an example of Brazil, where a single person’s average tax is five thousand dollars per year, which is spent by the government to provide state-of-the-art facilities to its citizens. Thus, it is justified to provide expensive health services to citizens. Secondly, free medical treatment is the basic right of a person. As the government is responsible for providing basic necessities such as health, food, shelter, so getting free health care is included in basic rights. For instance, states assume the obligations and duties under the International Law, to respect, to protect, and provide all fundamental rights. Hence, despite the cost, nations should provide free health services to their people. Finally, if treatments were not available, then it would result in higher morbidity and mortality rate in the country. As some segments of society such as unemployed, retired, and poor people are unable to get medical services due to its high cost, which resulted in increased suffering in the country. To sum up, I believe that I completely agree with the statement not only because of the levy imposed by the government upon citizens and providing free of cost health facilities is the government’s obligation, and higher death rates.
It is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thought
that every nation should offer the latest medical facilities to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
, irrespective of expenses and availability. I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this notion, not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it is the fundamental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
and taxes paying by
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of deaths due to
Possible spelling mistake found.
unaffordability
. This essay will explore how these factors justify my opinion.

Firstly
, the factor that compelled me to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with this statement is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
pay taxes to the state. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
has
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
fixed
a specific percentage on everything which they claim to spend for the betterment of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
, and that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
has to
be paid
by its. Take an example of Brazil, where a single person’s average tax is five thousand dollars per year, which
is spent
by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
state-of-the-art facilities to its
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
.
Thus
, it
is justified
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
expensive
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
services to citizens.

Secondly
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
medical treatment is the basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
right
of a person. As the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
is responsible for providing
Consider using "necessities".
basic necessities
such as
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
, food, shelter,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
getting
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
care
is included
in basic
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rights
.
For instance
, states assume the obligations and duties under the International Law, to respect, to protect, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
all fundamental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
rights
.
Hence
, despite the cost, nations should
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
provide
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
services to their
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
.

Finally
, if treatments were not available, then it would result in higher morbidity and mortality rate in the country. As
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
segments of society such as unemployed, retired, and poor
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
are unable to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
medical services due to its high cost, which resulted in increased suffering in the country.

To sum up, I believe that I completely
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agree
with the statement not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the levy imposed by the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
upon
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
citizens
and providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
free
of cost
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
health
facilities is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government’s
obligation, and higher death rates.
9Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
26Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Every country should have a free health service, even if this means that the latest medical treatments may not be available through the service because they are too expensive. v. 16

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
303 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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