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Essay topics: TPO 49- Independent writingDo you agree or disagree with the following statement? The ability to maintain friendships with a small number of people over a long period of time is more important for happiness than the ability to make many new f v.2

Essay topics: TPO 49- Independent writing The ability to maintain friendships with a small number of people over a long period of time is more important for happiness than the ability to make many new f v. 2
It is universally agreed that human tend to live socially in order to have happier life and making friends is one of the evidence of this tendency. There are substantial number of people who are of the opinion that maintaining friendship with small number of people have great importance for happiness than making a lot of new friends readily. I personally concur with this statement and explain my viewpoint with three points as supports. First and foremost, the concept of happiness are defined as to constantly have enjoyable time. When we spend more time with small group of people as called them our friends, we spend time to learn their characteristics which help us to trust them. However, our opinions may sometimes differ with each other. Finally, we accustom to the condition and gradually develop or relationship into creating happy atmosphere in which we all enjoy communicating with each other. For instance, my close friend are less than the total number of two hands, but I enjoy being with them. I Know them from more than 10 years ago, and we now get along well with each other. Therefore, with keeping small friendship, we make happily life for ourselves. Secondly, making friend in a short time cause to end this friendship shortly because as we do not know each other, our behavior may hurt the other. As a result, in the period of being in relationship, these people are more likely to have tough time than being happy. A vivid example is my sister. She has a lot of friends, while she is not very intimate with all of them. Consequently, She always is getting upset from the behavior of her friend, although I think they not as crude as she thinks. Additionally, the depth of relationship is significant for happiness because people are more wiling to be responsible about each other in respect of the long time they be with together. In conclusion, I believe maintaining friendship with small valuable friends are crucial to have happy life. This type of relationship have many advantages like creating respect, responsibility etc, which result in happier friendship than making new friend easily.
It is
universally
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
agreed
The verb 'tend' is plural. Did you mean: "that human tends"? Did you use a verb instead of a noun?
that human tend
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
socially
in order to have happier life and making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
is one of the evidence of this tendency. There are substantial number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
who are of the opinion that maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
number of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have great importance for happiness than making
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
readily
. I
personally
concur with this statement and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
explain
my viewpoint with three points as supports.

First
and foremost, the concept of happiness
are defined
as to
constantly
have enjoyable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. When we spend more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
group of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
as called them our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, we spend
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
to learn their characteristics which
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us to trust them.
However
, our opinions may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
differ with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
Finally
, we accustom to the condition and
gradually
develop or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
into creating happy atmosphere in which we all enjoy communicating with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
For instance
, my close
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
are less than the total number of two hands,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
I enjoy being with them. I Know them from more than 10 years ago, and we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
now
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
along well with each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
Therefore
, with keeping
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
happily
life for ourselves.

Secondly
, making
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
in a short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
cause to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
end
this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
shortly
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
as we do not know each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
, our behavior may hurt the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
.
As a result
, in the period of being in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
, these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more likely to have tough
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
than being happy. A vivid example is my sister. She has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, while she is not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
intimate with all of them.
Consequently
, She
The adverb 'always' usually goes after the verb 'is'.
always is
getting upset from the behavior of her
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
, although I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
they not as crude as she
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
thinks
.

Additionally
, the depth of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
is significant for happiness
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are more wiling to be responsible about each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
in respect of the long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
they be with together.

In conclusion
, I believe maintaining
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
small
valuable
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
are crucial to have happy life. This type of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
relationship
have
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
advantages like creating respect, responsibility etc, which result in happier
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friendship
than making new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
easily
.
11Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
39Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
2Mistakes

IELTS essay Essay topics: TPO 49- Independent writing The ability to maintain friendships with a small number of people over a long period of time is more important for happiness than the ability to make many new f v. 2

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
360 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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