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Essay topics: TPO 42. Workers are more satisfied when they have many different types of tasks to do during the workday than when they do similar tasks all day long. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v.1

Essay topics: TPO 42. Workers are more satisfied when they have many different types of tasks to do during the workday than when they do similar tasks all day long. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1
It is undeniable that spending time on television these days has risen among children. While this approach cannot be replaced by a book in terms of learning, I would argue that it may lead to some benefits for them up to a point. To begin with, one of the most crucial negatives that watching television can lead is that lack of concentration on courses among children. The reason behind this is that they consume a lot of time sitting on television which might be resulted in laziness and losing their control while learning. For instance, scientists announced that dangers behind long periods of watching television can lead to fatal risks which usually lead to suffer from mental health issues. In other words, a child who watches a television for five hours on a daily basis will often lose their concentration in learning. Consequently, lower marks in learning achievement. However, the appropriate use of these devices may add to children’s knowledge. The reason behind this is that some learning programs on televisions might have tremendous benefits on a child. To illustrate, the vast majority of people believe that watching a learning program that includes cartoons and colourful backgrounds is usually beneficial for a child than the basic kind of learning. In contrast, if these children did not learn visually, they would not had achieved high marks. In conclusion, although sitting for longer periods of time watching television can lead to severe problems, I would say that right use of these advancements will lead to better attainments than the regular way of learning.
It is undeniable that spending time on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
these days has risen among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. While this approach cannot
be replaced
by a book in terms of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
, I would argue that it may
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
benefits for them up to a point.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, one of the most crucial negatives that watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
is that lack of concentration on courses among
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
. The reason behind this is that they consume
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
time sitting on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
which might
be resulted
in laziness and losing their control while
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
.
For instance
, scientists announced that
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
dangers
behind long periods of watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to fatal
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
risks
which
usually
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to suffer from mental health issues.
In other words
, a child who
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watches
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
for five hours on a daily basis will
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
lose their concentration in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
.
Consequently
, lower marks in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
achievement.

However
, the appropriate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of these devices may
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
to
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children’s
knowledge. The reason behind this is that
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
programs on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
televisions
might have tremendous benefits on a child. To illustrate, the vast majority of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
believe that watching a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
program that includes cartoons and
Possible spelling mistake. 'colourful' is British English.
colourful
backgrounds is
usually
beneficial for a child than the basic kind of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
.
In contrast
, if these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
children
did not learn
visually
, they would not
The verb 'would' requires the base form of the verb: "have"
had
achieved high marks.

In conclusion
, although sitting for longer periods of time watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
television
can
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to severe problems, I would say that right
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of these advancements will
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
lead
to better attainments than the regular way of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
learning
.
7.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
7.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
7.5Mistakes

IELTS essay Essay topics: TPO 42. Workers are more satisfied when they have many different types of tasks to do during the workday than when they do similar tasks all day long. Use specific reasons and examples to support your answer. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
261 words
7.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 7.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 7.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 7.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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