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Essay #2: More and more people want to own famous brands such as cars, clothes, or other items. This is positive or negative? Give out your opinion. v.1

Essay #2: More and more people want to own famous brands such as cars, clothes, or other items. This is positive or negative? Give out your opinion. v. 1
Following the rapid development of human beings’ living standard, the need of purchasing luxurious items keeps increasing dramatically. As far as this is concerned, more benefits have been brought to our society than drawbacks. On the one hand, there are negative effects of this trend that worth considering. To begin with, the price of these garments is usually high and sometimes it can be adequate for a semester at schools, thus people should use it for other necessities, such as learning or doing charities; for example, a bag from Chanel or Louis Vuitton costs up to 60, 000 dollars, a significant sum of money that could do something more meaningful. Additionally, many teenagers are more likely to overspend on high-end products which may sink them into financial breakdown. Moreover, this tendency can result in raising the crime rate. For instance, by wearing expensive jewellery on the public, people can be susceptible to assaults since as these accessories are an invitation for crimes to be committed. On the other hand, prevalent brand consumption also exerts terrific benefits upon our lives. Famous brands provide customers with a great sense of satisfaction with high-qualified and reliable goods and top customer service. As an illustration, famous companies such as Nike, Apple, Chanel offer 12-month warranty and twenty-four seven free helps call centres to serve their consumers the best possible way. Furthermore, the strong wish for upscale merchandise can serve as the lodestar to push humans to develop and meet their own goals in life; as an illustration, a random businessman, who sees his partner wearing more renowned business attire will be likely to do his best to make money for a higher, or at least equal-classed suits. Consequently, the wealth and prosperity of the whole company are advanced. In addition, owning a reputable brand name is considered a must to express individuality, status and social rank. To give an instance, having a Rolex watch on your wrist or making phone calls by an iPhone from Apple is somehow equivalent to be estimated that you are recently in upper-class, or at least you are aware of being updated to the current propensity of modern items. To summarize, people have the right to purchase which they want to, and of courses, well-known brands for clothes or cars are not exceptional. Personally, I believe that is exactly the reason why the quality of life is heightened.
Following the rapid development of human beings’ living standard, the need of purchasing luxurious items
keeps
increasing
dramatically
. As far as this
is concerned
, more benefits have
been brought
to our society than drawbacks.

On the one hand, there are
negative
effects of this trend that worth considering. To
begin
with, the price of these garments is
usually
high and
sometimes
it can be adequate for a semester at schools,
thus
people
should
use
it for other necessities, such as learning or doing charities;
for example
, a bag from Chanel or Louis Vuitton costs up to 60, 000 dollars, a significant sum of money that could do something more meaningful.
Additionally
,
many
teenagers
are more likely to overspend on high-
end
products which may sink them into financial breakdown.
Moreover
, this tendency can result in raising the crime rate.
For instance
, by wearing expensive
jewellery
on the public,
people
can be susceptible to assaults since as these accessories are an invitation for crimes to
be committed
.

On the other hand
, prevalent
brand
consumption
also
exerts terrific benefits upon our
lives
.
Famous
brands
provide customers with a great sense of satisfaction with high-qualified and reliable
goods
and top customer service. As an illustration,
famous
companies
such as Nike, Apple, Chanel offer 12-month warranty and twenty-four seven free
helps
call
centres
to serve their consumers the best possible way.
Furthermore
, the strong wish for upscale merchandise can serve as the lodestar to push humans to develop and
meet
their
own
goals in life; as an illustration, a random businessman, who
sees
his partner wearing more renowned business attire will be likely to do his best to
make
money for a higher, or at least equal-classed suits.
Consequently
, the wealth and prosperity of the whole
company
are advanced
.
In addition
, owning a reputable
brand
name
is considered
a
must to
express individuality, status and social rank. To give an instance, having a Rolex
watch
on your wrist or making phone calls by an iPhone from Apple is somehow equivalent to
be estimated
that you are recently in upper-
class
, or at least you are aware of
being updated
to the
current
propensity of modern items.

To summarize
,
people
have the right to
purchase
which they want to, and of courses, well-known
brands
for clothes or cars are not exceptional.
Personally
, I believe
that is
exactly the reason why the quality of life
is heightened
.
8.5Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8.5Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8.5Mistakes
A foreign language is like a frail, delicate muscle. If you do not use it, it weakens.
Jhumpa Lahiri

IELTS essay Essay #2: More and more people want to own famous brands such as cars, clothes, or other items. This is positive or negative? Give out your opinion. v. 1

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
399 words
8.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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