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Environment is getting worse who are responsible ? is it government agree or disagree

Environment is getting worse who are responsible? is it government agree or disagree r8Gjm
It seems to be an increasing widespread concern that our environmental problems are worse and worse in any part of the world and we must action on them have to protect it from them before it becomes too late. Some people suppose that environmental protection is only feasible at a global level. I disagree with this point of view. We cannot deny that the role of governments and organizations is extremely important in protecting our planet and there are things that citizens unable to do, but government can. An example of that is the budget of programs to fight against the climate change is so enormous that an individuals cannot afford. Besides, when it comes to managing enterprises to circumscribe the quantity of emissions from factories, it is the governments from various continents who discuss and produce accords. Such as the 1992 United Nation convention against climate change and Paris agreement 2015. We cannot deny that the role of governments and organizations in protecting our planet is extremely important and there are things that citizens are unable to do, but governments can. An example of that is the budget for programs to fight against climate change is so enormous that individuals cannot afford. Besides, when it comes to managing enterprises to circumscribe the quantity of emissions from factories, it is the governments from various continents who discuss and produce accords such as the 1992 United Nation Framework Convention against Climate Change and Paris Agreement in 2015.
It seems to be an increasing widespread concern that our environmental problems are worse and worse in any part of the
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
world and
we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
action on them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
have to
protect it from them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
it becomes too late.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
suppose that environmental protection is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
feasible at a global level. I disagree with this point of view.

We cannot deny that the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
and organizations is
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
in protecting our planet and there are things that citizens unable to do,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
government
can. An example of
that is
the budget of programs to fight against the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
enormous that
Don't use indefinite articles with plural words. Did you mean "an individual" or simply "individuals"?
an individuals
cannot afford.
Besides
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to managing enterprises to circumscribe the quantity of emissions from factories, it is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
from various continents who discuss and produce accords. Such as the 1992 United Nation convention against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
and Paris agreement 2015.

We cannot deny that the role of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
and organizations in protecting our planet is
extremely
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
and there are things that citizens are unable to do,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
can. An example of
that is
the budget for programs to fight against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
change
is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
enormous that individuals cannot afford.
Besides
, when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to managing enterprises to circumscribe the quantity of emissions from factories, it is the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
governments
from various continents who discuss and produce accords such as the 1992 United Nation Framework Convention against
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Climate
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Change
and Paris Agreement in 2015.

IELTS essay Environment is getting worse who are responsible? is it government agree or disagree

Essay
  American English
3 paragraphs
246 words
This writing has been penalized,
text can't be
less than 250 words in Task 2
and less than 150 words in Task 1
4.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.5
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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