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Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. Discuss both these views and give your own opinion. v.35

Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. v. 35
In recent years, details requested by employers for jobs are drastically important step. While some believe that sharing personal information like hobbies, interest and marital status may be relevant, others think it is not. Herein I would discuss both the views and agree with the former. To start with, a company can decide the suitability of the candidate for the job. In other words, if a job requires frequent outstation travelling, a male, unmarried person would be best suitable. It also gives an Idea about the availability of applicant to stretch working in office. For instance, for a married female working in day shift would be convenient. To add, involving employees in their hobbies in leisure time would also increase retention in office. On the contrary, sharing of data can also lead to bias and breach of privacy. For example, if the interviewer likes cricket, he/she will select candidates who like cricket as well. Thus giving preference to a candidate they like. Further to this, there are also chances of misusing it. That might get influenced by the high status of the family or the lower status of parents and decide regarding suitability of the applicant. Also, sharing these can be used by colleagues and boss for public insults. Thus, people can draw conclusion regarding person's character as well. To conclude with sharing of personal information is inevitable, but can lead to disadvantages as well. Thus, in my opinion relevance of sharing family details is undeniable, but the authorities must maintain it under privacy policy as well.
In recent years,
details
requested by employers for jobs are
drastically
important
step. While
some
believe that
sharing
personal information like hobbies, interest and marital status may be relevant, others
think
it is not. Herein I would discuss both the views and
agree
with the former.

To
start
with, a
company
can decide the suitability of the candidate for the job.
In other words
, if a job requires frequent outstation travelling, a male, unmarried person would
be best
suitable. It
also
gives an
Idea
about the availability of applicant to stretch working in office.
For instance
, for a married female working in day shift would be convenient. To
add
, involving employees in their hobbies in leisure time would
also
increase retention in office.

On the contrary
,
sharing
of data can
also
lead to bias and breach of privacy.
For example
, if the interviewer likes cricket, he/she will select candidates who like cricket
as well
.
Thus
giving preference to a candidate they like.
Further
to this, there are
also
chances of misusing it. That might
get
influenced by the high status of the family or the lower status of parents and decide regarding suitability of the applicant.
Also
,
sharing
these can be
used
by colleagues and boss for public insults.
Thus
,
people
can draw conclusion regarding person's character
as well
.

To conclude
with
sharing
of personal information is inevitable,
but
can lead to disadvantages
as well
.
Thus
, in my opinion relevance of
sharing
family
details
is undeniable,
but
the authorities
must
maintain it under privacy policy
as well
.
8Linking words, meeting the goal of 7 or more
8Repeated words, meeting the goal of 3 or fewer
8Mistakes

IELTS essay Employers sometimes ask people applying for jobs for personal information, such as their hobbies and interests, and whether they are married or single. Some people say this information may be relevant and useful. Others disagree. v. 35

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
257 words
8
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 8.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 8.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 8.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 8.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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    Currently is not available
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  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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