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Employers should give longer holidays to employees to encourage them to do the job well.do you agree or disagree

Employers should give longer holidays to employees to encourage them to do the job well. 1emN
In the fast face of life, the productivity of the companies enhance because of the workers. however, it is a notion that holidays should be given to employees for a long time in order to give motivation for the betterment in job. I believe that the employers should not give holidays to the workers for a long duration of time. They should provide a holidays only for a limited time period. Further explanation will be given regarding this, in the upcoming paragraphs. To begin with, if employees have a free time for a long duration, consequently, it will have made the workers lethergic and after the long holiday, they may unable to pt their best in the work. For example many renewned multi-national companies who are providing holidays for a long time, are less productive than those who do not. Apart from this, the consistency of the workers will also be broken because they became habitual to stay leisurefor a long time and their dedication towards the work might declined. Moving further towards the aspects of providing holidays to the employees is that they should be provided with the holidays for a short time period, not too long as it will not only helps to reduce stress of people, but also aid to avoid the distraction from the workers towards the job. For instance, some consider that shorter holidays are more beneficial for the employees than the longer ones. Furthermore, short holidays will be beneficial for the workers to spend quality time with their family because on the daily basis they remain busy in their work. Thus, giving longer holidays is not effective way to motivate the workers. In conclusion, i disagree that longer holidays are given by the employers since it has many drawbacks for the individual as well as for the workplace. Rather than this shorter holidays would be advantageous for the motivation of the workers.
In the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
fast
face of life, the productivity of the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
enhance
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of the
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workers
.
This sentence does not start with an uppercase letter
however
, it is a notion that
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holidays
should be
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given
to
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employees
for a
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long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
in order to give motivation for the betterment in job. I believe that the employers should not give
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
duration of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
. They should provide a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
for a limited
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
period.
Further
explanation will be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
regarding this, in the upcoming paragraphs. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, if
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
employees
have a free
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
duration,
consequently
, it will have made the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
Possible spelling mistake found.
lethergic
and after the
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long
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holiday
, they
Did you mean "may be unable"?
may unable
to pt their best in the work.
For example
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many
Possible spelling mistake found.
renewned
multi-national
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
companies
who are providing
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
for a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, are less productive than those who do not. Apart from this, the consistency of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
will
also
be broken
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
they became habitual to stay
Possible spelling mistake found.
leisurefor
a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
long
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
and their dedication towards the work might declined.

Moving
further
towards the aspects of providing
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holidays
to the
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employees
is that they should
be provided
with the
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holidays
for a short
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time
period, not too
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long
as it will not
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
The verb 'will' requires base form of the verb: "help"
helps
to
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reduce
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stress
of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
,
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but
also
aid to avoid the distraction from the
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workers
towards the job.
For instance
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
consider that shorter
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holidays
are more beneficial for the
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employees
than the longer ones.
Furthermore
, short
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
will be beneficial for the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
to spend quality
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
with their family
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
on the daily basis they remain busy in their work.
Thus
, giving longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
is not
Please check whether an article is missing: "a effective".
effective
way to motivate the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
.
In conclusion
,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
disagree that longer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
are
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
given
by the employers since it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
drawbacks for the individual
as well
as for the workplace.
Rather
than this shorter
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
holidays
would be advantageous for the motivation of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
workers
.
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IELTS essay Employers should give longer holidays to employees to encourage them to do the job well.

Essay
  American English
2 paragraphs
318 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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