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Educations is not the learning of facts, but the training of the mind to think”. - Albert Einstein -

Educations is not the learning of facts, but the training of the mind to think”. - Albert Einstein - BYGba
Nowadays, education is one of the most important things in our life. However, learning facts is not the main purpose of it. In my opinion, critical thinking is a useful skill that we need to develop. First of all, training of the mine to think is the role of education. As can be seen from reality, there are a lot of students who don’t know how to use those facts and theories that they have learned at school. Therefore, if there are any problems, they can not be able to solve by themselves. That is the reason why i strongly believe that critical thinking is one of the most important skills in this modern world. Secondly, there are many ways to help the young generation improve and develop this kind of skill. For example, in many universities, people usually hold lots of activities for education purpose. Like the debate competition about the generation gaps between children and parents. At that competition, students can be able to talk about their opinions about this topic and protect it. Moreover, throught those activities, students are encouraged to become more active and good at thinking. A person who is good at cirtical thinking usually has more oppotunities to work and develop themselves in a professional environment. In short, Van Lang university is my only choice because i want to study in a professional, friendly and modern school which can help me to be more creative. In my view, i think VLU can add more activites and encourage students to make an effort to reach a higher level in their major.
Nowadays, education is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
things in our life.
However
, learning facts is not the main purpose of it. In my opinion, critical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thinking
is a useful
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
that we need to develop.

This phrase is redundant. Consider using "first".
First of all
, training of the mine to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
is the role of education. As can be
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
seen
from reality, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
who don’t know how to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
those facts and theories that they have learned at school.
Therefore
, if there are any problems, they can not be able to solve by themselves.
That is
the reason why
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
strongly
believe that critical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thinking
is one of the most
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skills
in this modern world.

Secondly
, there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
the young generation
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
improve
and develop this kind of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
skill
.
For example
, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
universities,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
usually
hold lots of activities for education purpose. Like the debate competition about the generation gaps between children and parents. At that competition,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
can be able to talk about their opinions about this topic and protect it.
Moreover
,
Possible spelling mistake found.
throught
those activities,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
are encouraged
to become more active and
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thinking
. A person who is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
at
Possible spelling mistake found.
cirtical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
thinking
usually
has more
Possible spelling mistake found.
oppotunities
to work and develop themselves in a professional environment.

In short, Van Lang university is my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
choice
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
want to study in a professional, friendly and modern school which can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
me to be more creative. In my view,
Is this the personal pronoun "I"? It is spelled uppercase.
i
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
Possible spelling mistake found.
VLU
can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
add
more
Possible spelling mistake found.
activites
and encourage
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
students
to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
an effort to reach a higher level in their major.
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IELTS essay Educations is not the learning of facts, but the training of the mind to think”. - Albert Einstein -

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
266 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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