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Due to the science and technology, the lifestyles of people across the globe are becoming more and more similar. Is that positive or negative development?

Due to the science and technology, the lifestyles of people across the globe are becoming more and more similar. Is that positive or negative development? LjqG
Science and technology have ushered in an era wherein more and more people are connected to each Science and technology have ushered in an era wherein more and more people are connected to each other. This also means that in many ways people around the world are becoming very similar. This situation is both – a positive as well as a negative development, which I shall discuss in this essay. There are many benefits of these global similarities. To begin with, people have become aware of other cultures and so are adopting the good points of all cultures, as a result of which, a global culture has arisen, which is being embraced by people around the world. Secondly, there is more efficient trade between different countries around the globe, thereby improving the economies of developing countries. There are also many reasons why some people think it to be a negative development. They say, that because of this cultural homogenization, national identities are being lost. We eat the same food, watch the same TV programs, listen to the same music and wear the same clothes. People have also started speaking one language, English, in many parts of the world. In fact, English has become the lingua franca today. They opine that the world is beautiful and enchanting because of its diversity. If the diversity is lost, it would become boring. However, I feel that this is a very narrow definition of national identities and nations are as different as they were ever in the past. Cultural identity is based on far more than just the films we watch or the clothes we wear. For example, take my own culture of India and compare it to the west. We may wear any clothes, but we never take the names of elders and we always call them with respect. In the west, it is quite OK to call anyone by name. In fact, they appreciate it more. I believe that after knowing about other cultures, we learn to respect our culture even more. So, some very deep-rooted national identities will always be there, even if on the face value it is apparent that people are similar. To conclude, there are more advantages of similarities among nations. People are becoming tolerant of each other and are adopting the best of all cultures. Total loss of national identities can never take place as all cultures have their inherent strengths, which can never fade away
Science and technology have ushered in an era wherein more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are connected
to each Science and technology have ushered in an era wherein more and more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are connected
to each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
. This
also
means that in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
ways
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
are becoming
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
similar. This situation is both
Consider using an m-dash if you do not want to join two words.
–
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
positive
Probable usage error. Use "and" after 'both'.
as well as
a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development, which I shall discuss in this essay.

There are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits of these global similarities. To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
have become aware of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
are adopting the
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
good
points of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
,
as a result
of which, a global
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
has arisen, which is
being embraced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
around the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
.
Secondly
, there is more efficient trade between
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
countries around the globe, thereby improving the economies of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
developing countries
.

There are
also
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
reasons why
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it to be a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
negative
development. They say, that
because of this
cultural homogenization,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
identities
are
being lost
. We eat the same food,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
the same TV programs, listen to the same music and wear the same clothes.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
have
also
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
started
speaking one language, English, in
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
parts of the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
. In fact, English has become the lingua franca
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
. They opine that the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
world
is
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
beautiful
and enchanting
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its diversity. If the diversity
is lost
, it would become boring.

However
, I feel that this is a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
narrow definition of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
identities
and nations are as
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
different
as they were ever in the past. Cultural
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
identity
is based
on far more than
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
the films we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
watch
or the clothes we wear.
For example
, take my
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
own
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
of India and compare it to the west. We may wear any clothes,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
we never take the names of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
elders and
we always call them with respect. In the west, it is quite OK to call anyone by name. In fact, they appreciate it more. I believe that after knowing about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
, we learn to respect our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
culture
even more.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
deep-rooted
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
identities
will always be there, even if on the face value it is apparent that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
are similar.

To conclude
, there are more advantages of similarities among nations.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
are becoming tolerant of each
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
and are adopting the best of all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
. Total loss of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
national
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
identities
can never take place as all
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
cultures
have their inherent strengths, which can never fade
Please add a punctuation mark at the end of paragraph
away
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IELTS essay Due to the science and technology, the lifestyles of people across the globe are becoming more and more similar. Is that positive or negative development?

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
408 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 5.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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