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Does technology play a role in making people feel more isolate?

Does technology play a role in making people feel more isolate? p5GD0
Technological innovation clearly helps us in our daily activities. Technology is rapidly progressing to its highest point, and the results are unbelievable. Inventions help us in various aspects of our lives, we can save time, like do some work at the same time while doing others, we use technology very often when we have office works, doing household chores, and when it comes to construction work, it is making things easier with fewer people because of power tools and high-tech types of equipment, other than this some of the new technology like high-tech gadget today are being used for fun. Computers and Smartphones have an amazing contribution to our world, but most of this machine or piece of technology has many negative effects on some users, which is why we really need to be aware of and sad to say that without the proper way of using these popular high-tech gadgets can separate people from families and friends, weakening their communications and driving them to isolate themselves, and on the other hand when it comes to the other person he or she will feel isolated. In this topic, we will see how this technology in the world affects many others and it create isolation into many. What should I know about the Negative Impact of Computers and Smartphones? Computer. It is one of the well-known advanced technology ever made and it has a lot of help in office works, with this you can write notes into word documents or send business proposals through email, you can search everything into an application installed called a browser, but that's not all, programmers use the computer to create programs by typing codes into notepad or other programming application and with this they can make websites and games and many more, even though it has much use it has the ability to change one person's life and focus. Many students with the age of 15 to 20 are addicted to computer games and they spend so much time playing with this, as a result, it is affecting their health because there were times when someone don't have the proper diet, don't have time for sleep, sometimes it might result in blurry eyes and having anxiety because of it. Also, it negatively affects interaction with family members and friends. The Kerman University of Medical Science gives information about youth and adolescence, which are the most affected by these addictive computer games. Research shows that most boys are addicted, and the reason is the joy and excitement of winning the game, particularly violent games. Furthermore, negative impacts on these children include rage and aggression, malnutrition, hypertension caused by video games, and social isolation. Many psychologists and mental health experts are giving much attention to the effects of video games. Smartphone. This palm-sized technology that has evolved rapidly in recent years provides an answer to the human problem of communication, just like a computer. You can easily contact your fellow employees with this, if you need assistance from a friend or would like to talk to somebody miles away or abroad, and also in emergency situations, you can easily make a phone call to a police station because of its size you can put it into your pocket. Not just like computer this piece of technology can be taken anywhere and everywhere, they almost have the same capabilities, you can send an email, chat with friends and download the application that you need or anything you think it’s necessary, but you must control yourself to use this. The use of smartphones in the wrong way will give you loneliness and before you know it, you are far from your physical friends because it was replaced by social media friends. When you get addicted you cannot stop using this device for browsing the internet, having online friends to chat, watching videos, and even live video streaming really has a negative effect on you. It's like you are making a barrier a big wall between you and your family, many are experiencing the same problem with their family like a scenario where they are having dinner but no one talking only tapping their smartphones or walking in the street while using cellphones. Social media applications contribute more to individual isolation CNBC gives us information about the study of loneliness and they discovered a growing link between social media use with feelings of loneliness. Loneliness was noted by seven out of ten heavy social media users, or 71%, up from 53% a year before. This compares to 51% of moderate people on social media feeling lonely, an increase from 47% a year ago. This indicates that the more time you spend with these apps on your smartphone, the more isolated you become. So, as we gathered information, we discovered that, despite the many benefits that technology provides to us, such as in our home activities and at work, we still need to exercise self-control because if we do not learn or limit our use of computers and smartphones, we will live a lonely life away from our families and friends. Just like Harold S. Kushner said, ” None of us can be truly human in isolation. ”
Technological innovation
clearly
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
helps
us in our daily activities.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Technology
is
rapidly
progressing to its highest point, and the results are unbelievable. Inventions
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
us in various aspects of our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
lives
, we can save
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
, like do
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
at the same
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
while doing others, we
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
very
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
often
when we have office works, doing household chores, and when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to construction
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, it is making things easier with fewer
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of power tools and high-tech types of equipment,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
than this
If the text is a generality, 'of the' is not necessary. Did you mean "some"?
some of the
new
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
like high-tech gadget
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
today
are being
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
used
for fun.

Computers and Smartphones have an amazing contribution to our world,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
most of this machine or piece of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effects on
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
users, which is why we
really
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to be aware of and sad to say that without the proper way of using these popular high-tech gadgets can separate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
from
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
, weakening their communications and driving them to isolate themselves, and on the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
hand when it
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
comes
to the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
person he or she will feel isolated. In this topic, we will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
see
how this
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
in the world affects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
others and it
Did you mean "creates"?
create
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
isolation
into
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
.

What should I know about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Negative
Impact of Computers and Smartphones?

Computer. It is one of the well-known advanced
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
ever made and it has
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
help
in office works, with this you can write notes into word documents or
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
business proposals through email, you can search everything into an
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
installed called a browser,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
that's not all, programmers
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
the computer to create programs by typing codes into notepad or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
other
programming
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
and with this they can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
websites and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
more,
even though
it has much
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
it has the ability to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
one person's life and focus.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
students with the age of 15 to 20
are addicted
to computer
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
games and
they spend
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
so
much
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
playing with this,
as a result
, it is affecting their health
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
there were
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
times
when someone
The pronoun 'someone' is usually used with a third-person or a past tense verb: "doesn't", "didn't".
don't
have the proper diet, don't have
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
for sleep,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
sometimes
it might result in blurry eyes and having anxiety
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of it.
Also
, it
negatively
affects interaction with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
members and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. The
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kerman
University of Medical Science gives information about youth and adolescence, which are the most
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
affected
by these addictive computer
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
. Research
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
shows
that most boys
are addicted
, and the reason is the joy and excitement of winning the game,
particularly
violent
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
.
Furthermore
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
impacts on these children include rage and aggression, malnutrition, hypertension caused by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
games
, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
isolation
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Many
psychologists and mental health experts are giving much attention to the effects of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
games.

Smartphone. This palm-sized
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
that has evolved
rapidly
in recent years provides an answer to the human problem of communication,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like a computer. You can
easily
contact your fellow employees with this, if you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
assistance from a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friend
or would like to talk to somebody miles away or abroad, and
also
in emergency situations, you can
easily
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
a phone call to a police station
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
of its size you can put it into your pocket.

Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
like computer this piece of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
can
be taken
anywhere and everywhere, they almost have the same capabilities, you can
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
send
an email, chat with
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
and download the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
application
that you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
or anything you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
it’s necessary,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
must
control yourself to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
this.

The
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of smartphones in the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
wrong
way will give you
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loneliness
and
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
you know it, you are far from your physical
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
it
was replaced
by
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
. When you
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
get
addicted you cannot
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
stop
using this device for browsing the internet, having online
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
to chat, watching
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
videos
, and even
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
video
streaming
really
has a
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
negative
effect on you. It's like you are making a barrier a
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
wall between you and your
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
are experiencing the same problem with their
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
family
like a scenario where they are having dinner
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
no one talking
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
only
tapping their smartphones or walking in the street while using cellphones.

Social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
applications
contribute more to individual
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
isolation
CNBC gives us information about the study of
Use a comma before 'and' if it connects two independent clauses (unless they are closely connected and short).
loneliness and
they discovered a growing link between
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
with feelings of
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
loneliness
.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
Loneliness
was noted
by seven out of ten heavy
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
users, or 71%, up from 53% a year
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
before
. This compares to 51% of moderate
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
people
on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
social
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
media
feeling lonely, an increase from 47% a year ago. This indicates that the more
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
time
you spend with these apps on your smartphone, the more isolated you become.

This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
So
, as we gathered information, we discovered that, despite the
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
benefits that
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
technology
provides to us, such as in our home activities and at
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
work
, we
still
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
need
to exercise self-control
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
because
if we do not learn or limit our
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
use
of computers and smartphones, we will
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
live
a lonely life away from our
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
families
and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
friends
.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Just
like Harold S.
Possible spelling mistake found.
Kushner
said,
Don't put a space on both sides of a quote symbol
”
None of us can be
truly
human in
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
isolation
. ”
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IELTS essay Does technology play a role in making people feel more isolate?

Essay
  American English
10 paragraphs
866 words
5.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.0
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.0
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 5.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
  • ?
    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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