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Does many people aware of environmental isues

Does many people aware of environmental isues 1nJeq
As in a polluted world nowadays, caring about the problems which are happening to our living place is important. From my point of view, many people, however, do not notice these issues. To begin with, although there are a lot of organizations, campaigns, clubs, and projects being held toward the target of raising people’s awareness, the results are superficial. These things, to be honest, might not create a real big change, a change that is in need. Some people just think that with a well-known organization or project, the effect on people’s mindset will be substantial. People who are provided with such severe information might just read them without taking their thoughts into action. I joined a competition about a year ago called Blue Innovation, which is a playground for high school students in Hanoi who have the intention and wish to make the world, specifically in this year it was about the environment, better. My team did some interviews and research with students in secondary and high school. The results, however, are unlooked-for. Around 85 to 90 percent of them do not care about the environmental issues or might know about them but are completely ignorant of organizations or projects. The rest of them are no better than that. They know about some projects but do not do anything. Those students just read the posts and give some likes, they do not care about the problems itself. Secondly, we have not had enough awareness of these issues since we were little. Not a lot of schools or parents teach their children what kind of human activity might affect the environment or even the ways to recycle. The 3R, reduce, reuse, and recycle, indeed, are easy to understand, to learn, and to perform. Showing the children this knowledge will gradually change the way they think and act. The environmental issues, then, will be noticed. In conclusion, environmental education in the present is still not enough to catch people’s real attention, which might motivate them to take action. Therefore, as a result, many people do not care enough about environmental issues.
As in a polluted world nowadays, caring about the problems which are happening to our living place is
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
important
. From my point of view,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
,
however
, do not notice these issues.

To
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
begin
with, although there are
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
organizations, campaigns, clubs, and
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
being held
toward the target of raising
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
awareness, the results are superficial. These things, to be honest,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
not create a real
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
big
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
, a
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
that is
in need.
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
Some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
that with a well-known organization or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
project
, the effect on
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
mindset will be substantial.
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
People
who
are provided
with such severe information
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
read them without taking their thoughts into action. I
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
joined
a competition about a year ago called Blue Innovation, which is a playground for high school students in Hanoi who have the intention and wish to
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
make
the world,
specifically
in this year it was about the environment, better. My team did
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
interviews and research with students in secondary and high school. The results,
however
, are
Possible spelling mistake found.
unlooked-for
. Around 85 to 90 percent of them do not care about the
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
know about them
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
are completely ignorant of organizations or
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
. The rest of them are no better than that. They know about
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
projects
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
but
do not do anything. Those students
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
just
read the posts and give
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
some
likes, they do not care about the problems itself.

Secondly
, we have not had
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
awareness of these
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
since we were
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
little
. Not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
a lot of
schools or parents teach their children what kind of human activity
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
affect the environment or even the ways to recycle. The 3R,
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
reduce
, reuse, and recycle,
indeed
, are easy to understand, to learn, and to perform. Showing the children this knowledge will
gradually
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
change
the way they
This phrase/word (depending on the context) can be potentially replaced with :
think
and act. The
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
, then, will
be noticed
.

In conclusion
,
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
education in the present is
still
not
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
to catch
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people’s
real attention, which
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
might
motivate them to take action.
Therefore
,
as a result
,
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
many
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
people
do not care
This phrase/word is too simple and can be replaced with:
enough
about
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
environmental
You use this word too often, consider replacing it with
issues
.
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IELTS essay Does many people aware of environmental isues

Essay
  American English
4 paragraphs
350 words
6.5
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 6.0
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 7.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
Labels Descriptions
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    Currently is not available
  • Meet the criteria
  • Doesn't meet the criteria
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