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Doctors, nurses and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sports celebrities. Do you agree or disagree ?

Doctors, nurses and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sports celebrities. 8jYV
Just as society continues to evolve, opinion regarding few profession have also changed over time. A significant number of people believe that film stars and sport celebrities are payed more, while doctors, nurses and teachers providing great help to society, and I agree with their perception. The rationale behind this viewpoint will be explicated in this essay, along with few evidence. The most potential reason is people are attracted towards entertainment nowadays. In other words, people watching celebrities on all social media application, helping them to earn extra income from it. Few sports men or women perform well once and become famous throughout their life, while people in other professions serving each day is not given much importance. This is apparent from a recent article published in a well-reputed newspaper, The Tribune, which depicted that celebrities catching eye of people on twitter. Another point to consider is people losing interest in such field like nursing and teaching. The reason behind it is, stream like this require plenty of skill and knowledge. Moreover, it also need time consuming courses or degree to be completed. After all that, patients and students are not giving importance to people like doctors, nurses, and teachers. This is further proved by expert who in India today magazine asserted that many doctors and nurses sacrificed their life by treating patients affected by COVID-19 virus. Finally, people also leaving such profession due to facing such life problems which are not expected. In conclude, public figures gaining multiple flow of attraction, importance and income, while other professions has negative outcomes in insignificance.
Just
as society continues to evolve, opinion regarding few
profession
have
also
changed
over time. A significant number of
people
believe that film stars and sport celebrities are
payed
more, while doctors, nurses and teachers providing great
help
to society, and I
agree
with their perception. The rationale behind this viewpoint will
be explicated
in this essay, along with
few evidence
.

The most potential reason is
people
are attracted
towards entertainment nowadays.
In other words
,
people
watching celebrities on all social media application, helping them to earn extra income from it. Few sports
men
or women perform well once and become
famous
throughout their life, while
people
in other
professions
serving each day is not
given
much importance. This is apparent from a recent article published in a well-reputed newspaper, The Tribune, which depicted that celebrities catching eye of
people
on twitter.

Another point to consider is
people
losing interest in such field like nursing and teaching. The reason behind it is, stream like this require
plenty
of
skill
and knowledge.
Moreover
, it
also
need
time consuming
courses or degree to
be completed
.
After all
that, patients and students are not giving importance to
people
like doctors, nurses, and teachers. This is
further
proved by expert who in India
today
magazine asserted that
many
doctors and nurses sacrificed their
life
by treating patients
affected
by COVID-19 virus.

Finally
,
people
also
leaving such
profession
due to facing such life problems which are not
expected
.

In conclude, public figures gaining multiple flow of attraction, importance and income, while other
professions
has
negative
outcomes in insignificance.
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IELTS essay Doctors, nurses and teachers make a great contribution to society and should be payed more than entertainment and sports celebrities.

Essay
  American English
5 paragraphs
263 words
6.0
Overall Band Score
Coherence and Cohesion: 5.5
  • Structure your answers in logical paragraphs
  • ?
    One main idea per paragraph
  • Include an introduction and conclusion
  • Support main points with an explanation and then an example
  • Use cohesive linking words accurately and appropriately
  • Vary your linking phrases using synonyms
Lexical Resource: 5.5
  • Try to vary your vocabulary using accurate synonyms
  • Use less common question specific words that accurately convey meaning
  • Check your work for spelling and word formation mistakes
Grammatical Range: 6.5
  • Use a variety of complex and simple sentences
  • Check your writing for errors
Task Achievement: 6.0
  • Answer all parts of the question
  • ?
    Present relevant ideas
  • Fully explain these ideas
  • Support ideas with relevant, specific examples
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